Juicy4Hotties

Take Lots With Alcohol
2002-04-08 07:01:09 (UTC)

Poems I found on the sXe vegan site about love

Love
This city feels so very cold tonight
even when the sun is shining,
It just feels so dark.
It seems colder than ever,
in a barrel of self-pity.

Life should be grabbed and lived.
Instead of all those dreams,
of darkness and despair.

If i want to, i'll damn this weather
for it's never, ever being right.
But i can't wait forever,
for you to change the way,
that you feel.

I could end up waiting forever,
so i'll go out into the rain.
Get caught in it and get drenched.

Just like you,
the wind swept away my heart,
and the dumb words were stopped.
In my mouth while they
were only forming.

I don't want to live my life
in a dream,
while there's precious time to kill.

I love you.
But i won't sleep each night,
on a bed of nails,
while waiting for the dawn to arrive
I want to live and i want time for everything.

****************************************************
BEING IN LOVE
I have loved maybe three or so people in my life, loved them as a
lover;
someone more than a friend.
A lover is someone who makes doubt disappear, someone who's smile
cancels
all my fear, and someone who makes me feel alive.
I've slept with people that I haven't loved, and although the
experience
has been nice, it has never seemed to improve our relationship.
Sleeping
with someone I've loved in a really big way has added to the
friendship,
like the icing on the cake. A point or a conclusion that I've
arrived at
in my life is that it doesn't get me anywhere if I don't love the
person.
I'm no moralist, so I'm into people doing whatever feels good for
them.

Many times I have tried to love people I've liked but not loved.
I've only
loved with my heart once or twice. It's no good half liking someone
you
sleep with as it always seems to widen the emptiness instead of
filling
it. Things always seem to degenerate that way.
I don't believe in any moral code. I believe that if it feels good,
then
go for it. I don't need or want marriage, be it blessed by some
scummy
vicar, or a marriage to another that's recognised as a "partnership"
by
people too scared to voice their honesty. Iknow that I need something
better than half- love.

I sometimes want you not to pay me attention, although there's
nothing
more I want than to be closer to you.
I seem to want to be at arms length these days. I somehow don't
think I've
got the patience to put up with the pains of falling in love. I
don't think
I can handle the clashes of emotion over such simple things.
I don't want the awful shiver of possessivsness back, even'though I
love
you.
It's funny to be so young, not even twenty three, yet I've had a
year free
of romance in which I was kept alive on nothing but friends and
acquaintances
It's a year that I've enjoyed, how good it feels to be independent.
I suppose
though as we may all do, to expect the person we've been dying to
meet
to be only around the corner?
Perhaps this is what has made the year so good, the thought that
soon I
will meet that special person.

When we enter a relationship and we are in a mess (average
conditioned
person) it causes pain.
My goal is to be in control of my ideas and not to use one person
for my
emotional needs. Not to need sex as a reassurance of love. Not to be
a
lapdog who idolises the person who's shadow he lives in. Not to stop
living
outside of the relationship.
My goal is peace in my head.
My goal is not to cause harm.
My goal is not to smother again someone I love.
My goal is to stand on my own feet and to enjoy the love of others,
I want
to support and learn to love other people.

When I think of you, part of me censors the memories. Part of me
still
lies awake waiting for your return. Three quarters of me
says "forget it"
it's all over. One quarter of me contains optimism and hope that it
will
be your letter at the door sealed with love.

***********************************************************





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