Catrina Can't Figure It Out
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2001-05-22 07:26:09 (UTC)

party in my pants

well, there is a party at my apartment tonight. my roommate
and i smoked before everyone came over. there are only
about ten people here so its not reallyy a party just
hangin out. they are about to leave, and i am high and dont
want to talk to them. my roommate came back from a weekend
at her boyfriend's. i hate not having a boyfriend. actually
i dont really want one, i just want someone to hang out
with and go do fun stuff. like go to the zoo,or the
aquarium or six flags. that stuff is so much more fun with
a boyfriend, or at least someone you are dating. i love
snuggling in bed on rainy sunday afternoons. ryan and i
used to do that at boarding school. i would sneak over at
6am on sunday when they unlocked the doors. we would lay in
bed till we had to checkin for study hall. we would order
in food, and listen to music and make love. it was
amazing.the best afternoons in my life. i wish i had that
again. i dont even remember what its like to be that close
to someone. i dont think i would even know how to get
there.its only been a year but i forget. maybe it should
just come naturally but there has been nothing between me
and these assholes i keep meeting. the guys that are
hanging out here tonight suck. i am not interested in any
of them, they are a little younger and not too cute.
anyways, they have been talking so dirty tonight. i hate
guy talk. all the girls were sitting on the couch and the
guys were at the table. they were talking about what girls
they fucked and how many times and blah blah blah. i have
never heard such disrespectful things about girls in my
life. they didnt realize that we could here them. they just
soundedd so stupid. i mean, they act like they are going to
win a medal just because they banged some girl and then
dicked her over. being mean doesnt seem too cool to me. i
have a lot to say about how much men suck.aproximately 85%
of men suck. i feel sorry for them. but that is another
story. anyways, i hate being so jaded about men. i know
there are good ones out there but i just cant seem to meet
any. anyways, must be social now....ill prb be back later
tonight when they leave and i cant sleep. INSOMNIA!

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