1 day in a life as it dies
2002-04-03 17:51:26 (UTC)

would you hurt yourself so a..

would you hurt yourself so a friend would be safe? would
you risk your life so they could not be controled? I would
do both of those things in a heart beat and did for about
a week everysecond I caused myself more and more pain so a
friend safe and free I would have kept going unto no end,
she would not be controled not by me at least I was to make
sure of that and I still am sure of it but under different
means, the pain is still there but not as much and will
probly always be there she knows who I am talking about so
I need not to say names, I am worried though she said she
needed to tell me something and I am worried about that but
then again I need to tell her many things......

ok on another note for those who have seen my whole diary I
have not talked to Nicki in 2 weeks ever since her bf got
back and I wanna know how she is if you read this e-mail me

Rosie and me are talking again I guess you could say and
she is going to read this so HI!

it matters not what hate we hold in the heart of our souls
for we all hate, it matters not what we fear in the deep of
our being for we all fear we all bleed the same life we all
die at a point but the thing that holds us unlike not every
being loves true

yeah yeah I know bad poem but I wrote it and its one of the
first in a long time

I had a dream last night that I am going to put in there to
cuz well why not,

I was standing in this clearing in the middle of the woods
looking up at the full moon I looked down for a second and
saw a pair of eyes watching me some light was refecting off
of them so I could see them but nothing else, I blinked and
they were gone I blinked again and there was a huge wolf
ontop of me pinning me down but I wasnt scared I looked in
the she-wolfs eyes and saw emotion there like human eyes
then I knew what and who I was looking at I called a name
her name and she rolled off of me and made a sound that
sounded like she was laughing I knew then I was right
something told me to follow her and I did we hunted
together all night side by side she showed me to her pack
and to her leader to whom I showed respect and he welcomed
me into the pack the dawn was coming so the she-wolf took
my hand in her mouth and pulled on it telling me to follow
( I couldnt hear anything but that one laughing sound in
the whole dream) and she went in the back up a house and
into a room I could only guess was hers she pulled the
shades and in the darkness I felt a human body next to mine
and well the rest I will only say to her