blushing

is it over yet?
2002-04-02 22:34:01 (UTC)

......

i feel numb. and ironically very very old. why?
understandable remark...dad beat the shit out of me last
night. he was drunk and i was sliding half wit remarks his
way and....wam. right across the face. everywhere. god damn
him. jon picked me up after i called him at like 330. half
calm, half on the verge of going insane, i managed to spit
out what was going on. spent the rest of the night there.
curled up in the corner of his room refusing to let him
touch me in any way. why me? why do i have to put up with
this? bill came by jon's this morning. he didnt know i was
there. he walked in to his room and saw me, curled up in my
jeans and jon's shirt...blood on my pants...he started
crying and layed down next to me. jon didnt like that. he
asked bill to leave. i got up and bill took me home. i didnt
want to go back. i never want to go back. yet here i am. i
write this from my room, the only place i thought id be
ok...and that in itself has decieved me
margo




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