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2002-04-02 05:34:44 (UTC)

...Everybody sucks,

It's just one of those days, when you don't wanna wake up.
........................... Everybody sucks,
You don't really know why, but you wanna justify,
Ripping someone's head off, no human contact,
And if you wish to ask, your life is on contract.
Your best bet is to stay away Mother F*****!!!


It's just one of those days, feeling like a grait train,
First one to complain leaves with the blood stain.
DAMN RIGHT I'M A MANIAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And if you wish to ask, your life is on contract.
Your best bet is to stay away Mother Fucker!!!!!

It's just one of those days!

(No not my period)

This weekend I had A TON of homework. Fortunately, yet not
fortunately for me, most of the stuff I had an excuse not
to do, or not to do well. (I DON'T LIKE THAT AT ALL!!!) I
had to correct my U.S. History Depression paper, so that
one of my teachers can check it again. The dude didn't
really have time to check it the first time so I just made
another spellcheck and reprinted. So history was done. Next
I was to study French, since we have a test tomorrow. I'm
gonna go on a field trip though so I'm gonna make it up
later. So I don't have to study that hard. Other then that,
I already did Physics and I just had A LOT of art to do. We
had this black and white painting to do in class, and we
had over a week to finish it at home. I started the first
day, but got pissed off when nothing was going good. So I
put it away, as all aritsts do in order no to mess it up
even more. I didn't feel like painting throughout the week.
I had to finish it in the weekend though. Much to my
surprise I forgot my paint. I had to Cut 1st period, and
purpesly get a tardy so that I wouldn't have to turn it in
that day.
I studied some French early in the morning today. I thought
I was gonna be late since my bro's left 20 minutes after I
wanted to leave. But there was less traffic so I only got
about 3 minutes late to my 2nd period. Second was okay. We
read a cool, short poem about an egyptian pharoah that was
a great builder. I liked that. On my way to class I made 4
April Fools jokes. I told my brothers that one of their old
friends from Reilley was a guest on Jerry Springer. (They
believed me. I told them the truth after school, but they
seemed not to care, and that took the fun out of it.) I
told this girl that shares a locker with the girl that has
her locker next to mine, that I'm late cause my bro's got
into a car accident. I also told that one to Kathy and
Aiondria, on the way to 2nd. So 4 by 2nd period. I was
kinda happy. During 3rd I was kinda laughing. Cause we have
2 Student Teachers that will be taking turns teaching our
class. One will be teaching us about WW2 this whole week. I
was smiling and gigaling throughout the whole period cause
even though he seems like a nice guy and a good educator,
he had some problems teaching. (I mean I never saw a
teacher to be, be so nervous.) That's not all. He also
couldn't spell well, kept saying like, was kinda dis
organized, and every now and then he would say: I'm not
exactly sure of this. LOL. I never heard a teacher say that
while teaching. (If answering a question I understand, but
come on, he should have had it down by now.)
4th - French. Guess what? Pop quiz on something I wasn't
even in class when we first learned it. Thanks to my
weekend study I might get a C.
6th - Music. Test. Supposobly we knew about it. He said
that the notice has been on the board since Wednesday.
Funny thing we didn't see it there then. Maybe he wrote it
afterschool. But he wasn't here on Thursday, the room was
closed, and Friday was no school. So I prabobly bombed
I was looking forward to some blocking in Theatre Tech, but
with the attitude of my class it kinda sucks the fun out of
it. Especially when we're not doing that. Instead we made
props for Grease. It was okay. I modeled some fairy wings
and a curler thing on top. My teacher took the wings right
away from the girl that was trying on the other ones cause
that annoying kid Nasser was helping her take them off. (I
don't know why, she didn't ask for help.) So she says,
Nasser don't put those on. He said he wasn't goin to, but
she was like, yeah right. (He's real fat so it just imagine
him with fairy wings.)
It started snowing and my brothers were late to pick me up.
Once I got home, I wasted as much time as possible to not
paint. I ate Mushroom soup, followed by 2 cheese
sandwitches, and almost a 1/2 a piece of pie. (My
favorite.) I thought, the longer I eat, the later I will
start painting. I didn't wanna do it, but I knew I had to.
Here is where the horror starts. I start painting, and as
usual everything is going downhill. I have not patience, my
brush strokes are showing, my paint is drying real fast,
and my paint does not want to have a smooth transaction
from white to black. I got pissed and put it away. I layed
down and started to cry. I got so pissed off. I mean, there
were days when I didn't wanna do anything but ART. No
matter what it was. The first homework on my list was art.
Even if it was due next month, or just extra credit. I
loved it, I was proud of some of my works, and people told
me I had talent for it. All that talent has turned into
Bull Shit. I know I don't wanna do this professionally, but
to be sick and tired of it to the degree I have gotten to,
is just sad and pathetic.

I went on line but there was no one on. I checked up on Which is the #1 place to be for me when I
have nothing to do online and am waiting for my friends to
get on. So I went and much to my surprise, the website is
lacking funds, so the creators have been in court to pay
off debt, and this will not last longer then two months.
Just when I started liking it, and making friends, who
would hopefully join in alliances with me.
Aman later came on. He pissed me off kinda when he started
laughing at my misfortune. I don't know if it's his way of
cheering people up, or if it seems normall infront of
someone. I told him that I'm gonna watch t.v. since there's
nothing better to do. (MEANING: Even talking to you doesn't
cheer me up, you're not helping.) I don't think he got that

My mom called the Travel Agent to look up how much are
trips from here to Calli. She didn't know what city so she
asked me and I said L.A. (I hope I got that right) She said
that it would be a round trip for like 3-5 days. (I got
pissed off. I can't relax within 3 days Bitch! (I thought)
And she adds to leave on like the 13th, 14th or 15th, I'm
just like: What the fuck is this? Well, after talking to
her I got back on line and here I am now. I'm finally able
to atleast write what happened.

It might not seem like much to most people, but it is to
me. Everything that my life is surrounded by reminds me of
a dream not accomplished. When I listen to music, I
remember when I wanted to be a musician. When I was
painting, I remembered when I wanted to be an artist. When
I looked in one place of my house that has a bunch of fruit
peals I remembered the reason why I started doing that. It
was something like a wish, or a reason to get out of this
house, per sticker. That wall is packed and I'm still here.
When I was coming back from school, the snow was falling,
and it created a rain effect. Something I always wanted to
draw. I could picture it still in my head. I still store my
gallery that will never come to life. When I saw Arthurs
old ACT prep book, I started worring about things I will
not accomplish in the future. The vast amounts of things I
will never get to do. Simply because of a tiny pebble in my
skateboards way. (Which by the way I still don't know how
to skate well. If I only knew how to jump, I might not have
this problem.)