Sarahbellum

no goodbye?

During my years spent online, I have made several
really good online friends. Sometimes I make an impression
and inspire someone to write me a little something
everyday. I remember a guy that (I still occasionally talk
to) was introduced to me by a close friend I worked with
once upon a time. He would email me everyday and tell me
he hoped my day was going well. I thought that was very
sweet. Sometimes a friends easy flow of emails slow down
to a trickle. He stopped writing altogether. At least he
does IM me every once in a while. Then there are others,
they just disappeer(sp?) They leave me wondering if I said
something wrong, if I didn't say something I should have
said; they leave me feeling guilty and sad. I don't mind
is someone gets tired of me, but I'd like to know so I
don't wonder constantly. I will never understand people.
I don't try. But I feel. And I worry.
*New Subject* My house is extremely odd. We finally
got the air on. Yay!...ok not so much. The upstairs is
hotter because of physics. HOT AIR RISES. Ok so my room
must be higher than the rest of the upstairs because my
room is the HOTTEST in the house. I opened my window and
put a fan in the screen in hopes to suck in some cool night
air. I sucked in some huge night bugs. :( I hate bugs.
Well no, I have much love for bugs, but I don't want them
in my room. There's a hole in my screen. I have the raw
end of the deal all around. I get the hottest room in the
house, and a hole so I get bugs. Hot and bugs...and why am
I NOT sleeping outside? I went to sleep at five in the
morning watching the news, the only channel I could get
that wasn't an infomercial. I was riding down the road
with my mom last night and I thought of this. "You're the
ache in my heart, the shadow in my dark. You're the tear
in my eye, the breath in my sigh." I don't know where it
came from or what I will do with it.