nin137

Nick's Journal
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2002-03-25 07:18:09 (UTC)

My Analogies or whateva they are called

Going down on a girl is like working the console for the
starship enterprise, so many buttons, you have to push the
right ones and you get where you want to go.
Going down on a guy is like playing the video game with a
joy stick. you move it around. you hit the two buttons.
and you win.

Dave greasing his hair asks me how he looks, my response:
It looks like you were eating pussy and you fell in.

Pulling a nick : (Joe Yavelak's definition), seeing random
dancing animals (preferably furry). While seeing these
random dancing animals, saying something so horrifically
offensive that Satan himself comes to kick your
ass.......well that last part was added by me. But if you
ever see a random animal dancing outside your window you
are pulling a nick.

Pulling a nick's mom : If your mom asks "____ are you on
the rock?"

Pulling a nick's dad : going to walmart and saying "What
do you mean you don't carry un-born baby yak milk? I will
cut you!", or somehow making the National news in every
2/3 visits to a public place.

Driving like Nick or his parents : Taking 2 lanes at a
time like you're getting paid to do it. Running old
ladies off the road a service to "faster drivers".
Hitting pedestrians and keeping them under your wheels
to "pad your tires".

Well it's alright. That's all i have and i know they're
not analogies, and i guess i strayed from the topic, and i
guess i might have spelt analogys wrong. but if there's
one thing i know, i'm good at eating apples really quickly
and making fun of butch dykes that serve me sbarro's. i
can laugh at dancing hamsters, and i can be the best
alcohol there ever be. i can drink 4 beers in three
minutes and that makes me cool. period. yeah that's bout
it. oh! you know when you burp and part of your
breakfast comes up? then you taste it for about half an
hour? isn't that practically what school is? we "digest"
this knowledge only to "burp it up" later on in life, and
then we "taste" our past. we remember the good and the
bad all from a calculus problem. just like when i tasted
that breakfast burrito from this morning i remember how my
cat recited the gettysburg address. yeah.
b'anh


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