Damsel in Distress

2002-03-24 15:59:02 (UTC)


well, as you may have seen i havent been online much
lately. i havent updated much in the past two days. it
happened when dad hit mom in the arm and kept asking her to
read the pictures. he thinks she wrote on pictures of us
when we were kids. well, the picture has a blue rug with
different color blues in it, and he things that the darker
blue is words...how fucked up is that? well, i was going to
go with mom to work and my sister was sick, so she was
walkin home...we had our puppy. we walked around UOP for
like 5 hours, so i was tired...tiffany was hungry, so she
went to go to the cafeteria..i laid with puppy in the
backseat. he pulled the puppy out of my arms and said im
taking him home. he was pissed off about the police in the
morning. well, i ran to mom as fast as i can and told her
about the puppy. well, she was scared. tiffany and i wanted
to get the puppy back, so we walked up nicely and asked if
we could take him to swim in the fountain cuz he was doing
that earlier. he said no. so we said fine we'll go to the
fountain...we walked, and when we got out of sight we ran
down the stairs and up them on the other side turned to
moms building and told her. well, mom was crying, and
Audrey called campus security. mom was starting to file a
restraining order. he is revoked from 100 feet from our
house, her work, and us. well, we drove to tracy to get a
police escort home, and well..we had 5 minutes to grab
shit. so, cpu unit, disk area for my stereo, camcorder, and
clothes. we left for awhile. but, when we pulled into the
food for less parking lot the plan was she was going to use
a phone away from the car, and i was going to kragens to
get my dashmat (which doesnt fit). well, he pulled up next
to us after i got in the car, well...he was yelling at me
how he is going to trash my room and burn my car unless he
gets 2k for it. well, i told tiffany hand me the puppy
really slowly get out and run to tell mom he is there. she
did. she was bursting in tears. she is very overprotective
of samantha. well, we left our house in my car, cuz he had
a copy of the key of it for sure, and he threatened it.
anyway, we took it and its still parked at lori slawsons
house. so, she will keep it safe. they were really nice for
all the help they gave us. lori's best friend is a child
abuse/rape/domestic violence councelor. mom is feeling much
better. well, also...i filled out a police report. dad
violated parol by stalking mom. so, now he will face the

mom is filing for divorce on monday. she has papers
started. i think this time she is serious...she bought a
car today. i hope she is serious...

sorry to make everyone worry. i am ok...fed up with his
bullshit. i guess im very protective over my sisters and
mom. i mean, they get on my nerves, but if someone
seriously tries to fuck with them...i get pissed, and i
will not let any of them get harmed. him...i dont give a
flying fuck about. he could rot in hell for all i care.
anyway...he comes anywhere near here...his ass will be
escorted to the jail with police. arghh...

at least amber and i got to be closer. she is a really nice
person. we were watching the island of dr. moreau together,
and playing with the puppies. she has three dogs...well her
family does. coco and chester were playin with our willy.
it was soooo cute.

things are looking up...i hope. after 20 years of an
abusive relationship she is going to leave him...i hope
everything goes well.
-damsel in distress


grandpa called. (i only have one grandpa the other was an
alcoholic and he was pushing a refridgerator upstairs and
he fell and it fell on top of him and crushed him to
death). anyway, it was dad's dad. well...he said dad called
him collect and he usually only does that when he is in
jail. well, grandpa said he wants to help dad, but mom said
it would be pointless. he can get his life together if he
wants to. i mean, he has a trailor, a motorcycle, a really
nice car, and a job that is waiting for him. it wouldnt
cost much to put his trailor on a lot. he could easily get
his life together. he has three thousand on him from
thursday, and money before that who knows how much. anyway,
grandpa was really nice. mom told him about how dad
scratched their names and phone numbers out of our address
book (his parents names and address), and mom said its not
fair to us, we should be able to call him anytime. well,
grandpa fully agreed. grandpa said he doesnt approve of
what his son does at all. he has always been a fuck up.
grandpa was telling me this. he called at like 650...and i
talked to him for like 20 minutes. i said mom wasnt awake
yet, so i was talking to him for a bit explaining the
situation. he said that he hopes we learn what dope does to
the mind and he hopes we never do it. i guess grandpa would
be a better father figure than my dad, but...at this point
i consider myself to have no father. yes, i am disowning
him. my father is a fuck up, and right now, he has lost so
much. i mean, my sisters, my mom, and i dont ever want to
see him again. especially mom. who could blame her? i mean,
she has been reading and stuff. i gave her some pamplets
and some books to read. psychology books mainly, and she
read them. she has learned a lot from them. i actually even
let her read my domestic violence chapter in one of my
books. its quite long because of the knowledge of it i have
obtained, and i think all of it has helped her. she is
putting a wall up, and doing the "no contact" process. i
honestly think this time it will be finally over. maybe we
have a shot at a happier life? i dunno...im hoping. grandpa
and grandma would always try to settle their fights down.
when i talked to grandpa, i told him this has been going on
twenty years of arguing, fighting, beating, jail, and
hatred. they dont need to be together, and mom doesnt want
this life...she doesnt want him. grandpa understood why,
which i guess is good, and he seemed to want to keep in
contact with her. so, i guess they are going to be there
for us.

mom is looking a lot healthier. she is not going to work
overtime anymore. she is working out more, and she is
sleeping more. i mean, the bags under her eyes are almost
gone, which is really good. she has eaten more, and the
working out makes her feel better. she is picking up a lot
quicker than last time. anyway, i am going to catch a few
hours of sleep because he practically distroyed the house,
and it will take awhile to clean...so gotta build up energy.

whatever doesnt kill you only makes you stronger. i know
this for a fact. ill write again later.
-damsel in distress