Crystal

Crystal
2002-03-23 01:27:54 (UTC)

I have lost him

Latley I have been talking about my frined jason. The one
that I really like. Yeah him, anyways, i don't think that
he is into me anymore because I just don't know I mean I
like him and all but I just can't tell him it is literally
impossible for me I don't know why but it just is I mean I
would like to tell him and all but I can't I don't know why
I just can't I mean I do love him and I would like to tell
him and I would like to show him but I can't I truly want
to and I have thought about it for a while and I want him
to be with me for the rest of my life. But I know that that
isn't going to happen because my life would be to ausome to
make me happy. I mean yeah it is good that he found me and
that him and I are reunited and all but I don't know I
don't think that he is in love with me anymore now that he
has found that other girl and I don't know what to tell him
if I was to ever tell him how I feel. I feel that he would
laugh at me out loud or he would just laugh at me in his
mind and then tell the girl that he likes and then tell all
of his friends and I don't like to be imbarassed because I
am not that type of a girl. I don't like it when I walk
down the hall and I have all of these people saying roud
shit to me I don't know I just hate it and it really makes
me up set and I don't like it. All of my life I have been
treated as an outsider. I don't know why I think it is
because I have not had the nice brands like tommy and all
of that but I mean who the hell cares besides everyone the
fact of the matter is that it shouldn't matter what you
wear it shouldn't matter what kind of a car you drive it
should matter though if you are trust worthy or if you are
kind hearted or if you are a good friend and you are easy
to talk to and you are smart not your looks because that
isn't what is going to get you a job it isn't what your
life is going to be depended on they don't care if you were
popular in high school they don't care if you were the best
friend in the world. They don't care all they care about is
if you had good grades a head on your sholders that wasn't
full of shit. I mean all the guys no a days all they care
about is getting pussy and it makes me really mad. I mean
there is a girl at my school who was going out with this
guy and she did literally everything with him. I mean liked
sucked his dick and got fucked and everything like that but
she never did get butt fucked she wouldn't and then her so
called best friend who is a guy might I add was sitting
with his friends and was saying that how she did get fucked
up the ass and all and she has told everyone that she did
get fucked and everything but not up the ass because she
thinks that is grose and all and I mean what she has done
with this person already is nasty but I mean it is her life
and no one can change that because it is in the past and
all of the guys now make fun of her about it and she is
getting mad and i understand why she is getting mad but she
also has to realize that they have to talk about it because
that they are never going to get it because they don't have
a life and they need to get one I know but they won't and
it makes me mad. I wish that I could tell jason how I feel
but with what i just typed I think that you have now
figured out that I can't do it. Well I think that i am
going to go talk to you later,
Crystal




Ad: