my so called life
2001-05-16 03:25:12 (UTC)

may 15, 2001

okay i really really don't understand guys. i was over
scotts house today and we were messin around and talkin and
stuff while he was watching the phillies game. so then i
said shush and like usual he would stop talking. so i told
him if he doesn't start talkin ill shut the game off. so i
wnet for the remote and i took it and turned the game off
jokingly and he said..okay fine ill go watch it downstairs
and i said noo and turned the game back on and called him then he instead of gettin on the bed
and layin next to me he got on the floor in front of the tv
and watched the game and didn't talk to me at all!!!
literally at all!!! then when it was time for him to take
me home he just got up and put his shoes on and i got up
and put my shoes on and we left...nothing was said in the
whole car ride...i was pissed!!!! the when it came up to
the stop sign up before my house he didn't stop and kiss me
like he does every time that stop sign comes around.. then
he pulled up to my house and i locked the door said goodbye
and slammed the door. i don't get why hes mad. hes the one
who ignored me while i was at his i don't get it
and i am really upset cause now im thinkin i messed
everything up as usual...i messed it all up. it was all me
all the time always me. its always my fault...i lose my
friends to drugs and etc. and now im left by scott and i
have no idea why. im confused i wanna just go and jump off
a bridge...i duno what to do...and to top my day off my dad
just got home and he is drunk off his ass!!and now i don't
think scott will be getting online...i don't understand
guys...i really don't. i dont know what to do...i guess
ill just wait alittle bit to see if he calls or
somthing...kay well wish me luck...cause my luck could get
worse and im hopin it doesn't...
~peace out~:*(