Queen Bee

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2002-03-21 18:08:33 (UTC)


hey everyone, im just chillin here. man last night, red,
ex and justin came over and everything was going good until
all of a sudden i just started crying. I know why but they
dont. Im sick of looking the way i do. i think im fat
although i know in the backof my mind im not (im a size 5)
and i dunno. im just fat to me. and i see raven and red
with there nice boobs and i want some. i like dont have
any. i mean i wear and average size (34b) but still and
guys just seem so fascinated by them. i know that guys dont
like me because of the way i look and people are constantly
telling me im perfect (HA!!)but still. i dont want to be
like this. i dont want to have to starve myslef again but i
hate feeling this way. and last night when me and ex were
fuckin with each other,it was like the best thing ever. and
the whole night i jsut wanted to kiss him and do very bad
but very good things to him but i couldnt cuz were not
together, and that wouldnt be right. and i dont want to
rush him cuz he needs to figure his shit out and i do need
to be by myself for a while but i just dunno. i guess
things will be what they'll be and when they'll be. just
why cant they be good for once?

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