mitra

isolation
2002-03-17 08:18:47 (UTC)

forgotten and forbidden

i have come across a few strange things over the past few days
i have been forbidden to enter my grandmamas' room after
daytime.
even during the day i rarely see her...i am much too afraid
i do not like the look of her skin...it has too much of an
uncanny resemblnce to a wrinkled up mouldy paper bag.
she disturbes me to no end.
her voice screams putrid things at me and her bony fingers
point at me accusingly and i feel as though i am being
interiogated by an old retired,yet experienced lawer with
nothing else to do but demand answers to immpossibly
philisophical questions which i vex my head with every nnight.
this is the only reason i ever visit my grandmama, to get
the answers to her never ending line of questions...
she is always throwing questions at me which at first i find
are so difficult and i wrack my head for the answer...but in
the end she gives me an answer and ill be wondering : why
didnt i think of that.
my grandma is a weak woman, she was struck by a strange
disease when she was 40 and has been bed-ridden since.
i can tell she feels pain every day...i hear her screams
echoing throughtout the entire house at night.
she is also very head-strong, my grandmama.
she nnever asks for help from anyone...and if you offer
asssitance she lashes out at you with her old wiker whipping
stick.
she scares me but i respect her for her intelligence and the
experience she has gained in various feilds over the years.
my mama says that the only reason grandmama is so angry with
everyone is that she blames the world for taking grandpa
away from her.
you see grandpa ran away with another woman once grandma got
sick
she has been angry ever since and has never trusted a soul.
i fel sorry for her.
she may recover, but i secretly hope she never
recovers...otherwise she will leave us all behind and then
who will ask me questions and who will shout and yap at me
and most of all...who will i take pity on other than myself?




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