my life (as told by me)
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2002-03-16 22:10:24 (UTC)

times sure have changed....

today is the what, 16th i believe. and everything has been
changing. i've been busy as hell with my shithole term
paper. so, i havent had too much time to write in here.
sorry to those who still care and read this. anyways,
things have changed a lot. i've changed a lot. i've finally
come to realize that josh wont ever like me the way i'd
like him to. he's got his girl, and he's happy with her.
so, this has come to be a battle i've lost. and other
people are getting on my nerves. amber for one. i could
deal with her not calling me a dog and all that shit at
lunch. i mean come on, do we have to be that stupid to make
ourselves feel good? obviously we're still in kindergarten.
britt is going through a tough time, and i'm doing my best
to help her through it. but sometimes, i feel like what i'm
doing isnt enough, like there is more i could do for her.
i'm trying my what else is bothering me. oh yes,
everyone getting on my case because for once i have fun at
a dance. let's all get mad at me for having some fun. it
was the only time this week i felt free and away from
everything in my problems, my term paper,
everything. and what happens? i get yelled at. i honestly
didnt care for one night. and it all blows up in my face.
sucks cock. i cant have fun anymore i guess. god. and i'm
getting sick of not being able to drive anywhere unless my
parents are in the car. only a few more weeks and i can
drive on my own. my dad will be lucky if he ever sees that
truck again. he actually said if i paid the rest of the
payments on it, i could have it! lol. yeah i wish. i need a
job first. that's another thing bothering me. i'd like to
get a car or truck, but since no place is hiring, i cant
work anywhere. i'm stuck with no vehicle of my own. god
that bites. i just want to be able to have the freedom to
leave with my OWN vehicle and not having to be back so my
parents can use it. and once i do get my own vehicle, it's
gettin 2 subwoofers, and a whole new stereo system in it.
and if i feel like it, neon lights on the frame of it. haha
wonder where i got that idea from...andy. lmfao. dork.
anyways, nothing else matters in my life anymore. my horse
got vaccinated, almost killed the vet. hm....yeah that's
all that i care about right now. wait i care about nothing.
nevermind that...........