Realizations of a 24yr old convict
2001-05-13 08:51:46 (UTC)

Listening to patsy cline and..

Listening to patsy cline and its just about right Id
have to admit, I live by the music always Prettty much as
long as Im awake theres tunes in the background or on full
frontal assult if its possable the only thing I know of
better than the music is personal conversation,
So I turned down this date to go over to girlys and
watch a flix so I could get some sleep but now its about 2
and Im just about to get going strong Had to check the
email and theres like 10 new ones I should be W/B as I type
this but one was from super bad who has a jornal and I
thought I better write some jornal in here,hind sights
always 20/20 I should have just smashed over to girlys
cause I could have just crawled up next to her and gone to
sleep and I would have been out hours ago,I didnt though
and heres why or mabe not
shes kinda a drama queen I think shes just board needs a
life like I spoke of before, Ok my lifes on a pretty
straight track and its not built for a relationship fuck
its not really even built w enuff time to sleep she cant
grasp that concept I dont know actully I havent taked to
her about it actully but I will asap Its like I said before
as a man a real man I feel I gotta let her know where Im at
where anything with us is headed I used to be good at
letting people hold on with false hope and so on but now,
Heres another thing I dont think people get If your my
friend know that thats all I give a fuck about is you what
you think whats up with me and you. No one else fuckem who
the fuck are they EG when I was at her house before & the X
live in b/f came by at like 230am and he knocked and came
in and saw me there all cuddled up on the couch with her so
he just bummed a smoke and got the fuck on I was polite to
him and he left all friendly with me,then I talked to her
and shes like yeah I saw dude and he said he thinks your a
fag.ha/ha OK so you might catch me singing a show tune here
or there and much resperct to all who go that way but it
aint me.Anyways this girl didnt even need to bring that
shit to me I dont care about that dude or what he says
hes some tweeker dude that now lives in a motel and has some
half ass job working for his X father in law, Oh yeah and I
used to smash dudes like him all day.
Its just a fucking waste of her breath and my time to
spend even a few seconds of life on anything this dude has
to say or think I only speak on it now to give a better
example of the shit I hear and see people waste the days
away on.Its a joke cause if I see dude he aint gonna say
shit to me this I know and second if it came to that him
being that brave Id probly just walk on with out a second
though and move on toward the beach house and 200,000K a
year while he continues to work hes rad ass job and when
hes 50 and his lifes all about regret mabe hell look back
and rember me and at least have that good feeling like yeah
I told that dude,but mabe not mabe hell wanna chunk'em like
some kids on a school yard and then hell really know what
time it is with me(fuck Ive been a savage all my life Its
probly one of the few things Im really good at) and itll
just be one more regret in his long life of
disapiontment,and Ill come home and feel bad for dude for
about 20mins and then back to the beach house plan, what a
fucking joke people are!
Anyway If you see your self getting caught up rember life
is longer than just the moment
and everyone elses drama is theres you dont own any of the

stay positive