Queen Bee

2002-03-14 06:31:41 (UTC)

cha right.

All i have to say is cha right. i came home form ravens
just a skootch ago and i checked the caller id to see if ex
called and wheni didnt see his number i jsut laughed at
myself, cha right like he would call me, that would mean
actually mean showing he cares. Like hes gonna take time
out of his busy day to call me. If your reading ex, sorry
but jesus!! i just feel like total crap right now. I feel
like no one gives a flying fuck about me. its like i could
just vanish and it would probably take people a few good
days to figure out i was gone and thats only becasue theyd
be like isnt there someone else thats suppose to be here, i
think Melissa is gone, ah well. the only one who would
notice would be Raven and maye Red. its a really cappy
feling to think no one cares. and then dont even get me
started on people not listening to me. its like no onbe
lets me talk and then when i finally get to talk, everyone
interrupts or doesnt care or whatever. then this whole
thing with me feeling bad about myself is driving me up the
wall. I already lost weight and if i keep losing more
people will start bitching about that. god im not good
enough for that person and im too skinny for that person, i
talk to much for the other one and that one thinks im a
bitch. and people wonder why i dislike myslef so much
sometimes. its like im not good enough for that person so
they want me to change and then someone else thinks i need
to gain weight and then if im me than im just a bitch but
heaven forbid i try to tell someone something that is wrong
with them, when im handin out the critism no one will take
it but i have to. because if i dont i get bitched at, i get
yelled at, im to much of this, not enough of that. All i
have to say is fuck you all!!!

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