kiss me, kill me, hold me, thrill me
Ad 2:
2002-03-14 03:35:00 (UTC)

poem of sorts

I wish this world were easier
why must we cry
why must our loved ones die
there are days when I can't take it
I say I've had enough
I want to end it then and there
It's hard not to want to die sometimes
It seems like such an easy answer to a hard life

But when my friend tells me they want to die
I stop them
Now I wonder why
Why would I let myself die and spare their life
I guess it's the good friend thing to do

I could have said let's do it together
Let's end it all right now
I didn't do it
I'm glad I didn't let them do it
I don't know why I didn't though

This life gets tough sometimes
So tough I just can't take it anymore
I want to go away
Go away and not come back
To start a new life

I want to be five again
To start school over and make new choices
Better choices
I didn't make the wrong ones
They weren't the best ones though

Maybe I could be different
I could be less shy
I would be able to stand up and just do things
This world might have seemed cold sooner
I wish I had seen what this world was like long ago

If I had know what this world had to offer me I might have
done things differently
I might have been popular
Or at least I might have had a boyfriend before age eighteen
I might have done something daring

This shell around me might not be so tight
I live in my own little world where the sun rises and sets
each day
Things don't change much here
I am still that same little girl who I was 10 years ago

Back then I was a year away from being a teenager
Today I am a week away from being twenty-two
A week away from yet another year that I don't know how to
I don't know how to stop the madness

My brain is crying out for something new
I want do something unexpected
Being the same dull girl sucks
I want to run away and be someone else

Maybe I could be a dancer
That would be fun
I could have fun up on stage doing my thing

Or I could be a singer
What my voice lacks they can make up in the studio
I can show a little leg at the concerts and have lots of fans

Or I could do the most daring thing ever and just be me
Accept who I am and work within the life I have
I can make it
I will survive the hard times
My friends will be here and things will work out
I will make it in this harsh world

I will make it because I am me