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2002-03-12 00:31:12 (UTC)


I don't know if it's me, but I have a sick feeling that
they've lowered the criteria to get a driver's liscense
these days. Either that, or the presence of those god-
awful, obscenely huge SUV's are making people who already
have a liscense care less about their driving skills- Cause
who gives a shit about safety when I have a 3 ton, 20 foot
tall metal cage around me.

It seems like, more than ever, there is an overabundance of
absolute morons on the road. But the sad part is, they're
not just stupid 16 year olds... most of them are adults,
that theoretically should already KNOW how to drive! Wait a
minute, wait a minute.. perhaps they would know how to
drive if they would get off their damn cell phone, put down
that burger, or keep their shot gun on the rack while
driving. However, I don't know if it's this easy.

Now granted, I'm not saying I'm the 'Driving Master' or
anything here. But at least I'm a GOOD driver. There are so
few of those on the road that it is just frightening-
especially where I live. It seems like the bigger the car,
the more toys the driver has inside to play with and
distract them with. Now, if these drivers were good ones to
begin with, those distractions wouldn't be that big of a
deal.. since they wouldn't let them distract them. It's the
slack-jawed yokels that cruise down I-95, with a cell in
one hand, a McDonalds bag in the other, driving with one
knee, while typing on their palm pilot with their foot that
I have a problem with. Yes you.. that guy going 55 in the
passing lane that held up traffic for 2 hours last week..
I'm talking to you.

But really when I think about it, I'm giving people a
crutch to rely on. Distractions merstractions. The truth of
the matter is, some people just can't drive. Travel on any
major interstate anytime soon and see what I mean. Living
near Washington DC I see it all.... and then some. People
who can't merge (the ever-popular slamming on brakes and
flipping on a turn signal at the end of a ramp is a
favorite around here), or people that feel that they are
special enough to switch lanes without a turn signal.. or
without checking their blind spot. My real favorite is when
people feel that they are above sitting in traffic, and
decide to turn the shoulder into a new lane. Oh yeah,
because you're not making the situation worse by doing that-
oh no. No no no... you're important.. things to do, people
to see. Not like anyone else traveling on the highway has
anything like that to do.... nah. You must be the only one.

When all is said and done there really isn't much that we,
as a society, can do for horrible drivers. Well, except for
giving them this one reminder: when in doubt, tap or slam
on your brakes repeatedly to slow your car. Because just
taking your foot off the gas pedal is NOT enough! No, you
must tap your brakes in order to create traffic chaos.
Otherwise, you're just not an effective driver.

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