2002-03-12 00:23:08 (UTC)

Thoughts on Immortality and Child Bearing- Part Deux

For some of my interning experiences I work in a genetics
lab.. I do genetic write ups on various couples needing
invitro, or the now popular 'test tube babies', wherin the
parents are able to pick certain traits that they would
like their child to have. This is all well and good as long
as you feel the need to support any Hitlerish 'pure-race'
tendencies.. however, it becomes a problem when the parents
themselves have no really solid traits to give the child.

A couple came in the other day who wanted a tall, blonde
hair, blue eyed, athletic son who could pretty much leap
tall buildings in a single bound. Too bad their combined
traits equaled the exact OPPOSITE of what they were looking
for. Lovely! I had to hold my tongue to keep from
saying "Well, looks like it's time to scrap that guy and
find another." Though, I don't think it would have done
much good either way... as she seemed pretty content with
this guy.. and.. no matter who she was with, she would have
horrible horrible children. Period. One can't work miracles
with a horrible genetics wheel. It's like wanting a Tom
Collins, but only having Bloody Mary Mix and a left-over
cup of flat soda water. Just doesn't work.

If you have never heard the term "Ice Princess" in the
reproducive sense before, let me take a second to explain
this before I go on with my next opinion on the subject. An
ice princess is someone who, lacking the presence of an
actual male in her life, seeks out frozen preserved
remanants of other men, of whom she does not know, in order
to create a life for her to enjoy later. Yes, this is the
frequent to our friendly neighborhood sperm bank; the one
who adores making sweet sweet labratory love with
a 'fertility wand', resembling a turkey baster. Oh yes, it
is this woman.

Ice princesses never cease to amaze me. Granted, I will say
that this option is totally legit in many instances... male
sterility, lesbian couples, what have you. It is when a
love starved, psycho hose beast of a woman (with thanks to
Wayne's world for that one) wants to have a child to fill
the gaping hole in her heart left by her former lover Earl.
I mean, c'mon people! How warped would such a child turn
out to be! Contantly having to fill those kind of roles? I
smell a Bates senario here.... or perhaps we will have
another James M. Barrie in the making... Hey, we could
always use another Peter Pan....

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