sarah beara

whenever i hear your voice, it..

whenever i hear your voice, it gives me that tingly
feeling....whenever i hear your laugh, it gives me the
chills...whenever i think of your smile, i can't help but
smile too...

i love you so much....more than you will ever know...

these past few days have been the most painful for me since
february 10th....i mean, i've never felt this feeling
before.....it's completely crazy....i never realized how
dependent i was on you....until now....

i've even had things to do during the past few days - but i
just don't feel like doing them....all i can think about is
you...all i do is sit and wonder if you are thinking about
me...but i know you are probably WAY too preoccupied for
that....not a bad thing...it just gives me a sad and
extremely lonely feeling when i think about it.....i can't
describe it...but i know if i were you, i might not be
thinking about me.....no, nevermind...i can't say that at
all...lol

i've been talking to my friend jon alot lately....until
recently, we weren't as close - but he's helped me alot
with quite a few things....

i guess i just missed you when you were online
tonight....that sucks....

i don't know why i'm so sad and why i feel this way...i
just have this incredibly funny feeling....not funny in a
good way - more of an incredibly fucked up feeling....i
can't describe it, nor can i tell you where it's coming
from...it's just...there.....

i love you sweetheart and i REALLY hope we can talk for at
least half a minute sometime today....i hate this....

i went to my cousins wedding and i felt so lonely...all i
could think about was you....it was horrible....i wanted to
be there with you....i wanted to not be alone...i wanted to
have someone to hug me and make me feel ok....i wanted to
just have you be there....but i know you couldn't have
been...and i know you'll be there soon - so that is what
made things about 5% better (okay a bit more than that i
guess.... lol ;) )

i just miss you.....everything about you....i can't wait to
see you again in just a few days....i love you more than
you'll ever know sweetheart....

i love you *wipes tears out of her eyes* so much....