Ginger Gal

Welcome to my life...
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2002-03-10 04:08:16 (UTC)

I never know what to title things..... lol

Here I am again. I am better than last night, not quite as
stressed out. Stess moments come in spurts for me, one
time I will be ok. And then the the next I will be over the
top.

I told DB last night about the problem we were having. He
tells me not to worry, that he is on my side so everything
will be fine. *smiles* He is so amazing. Anyway, I told
him that we would need alot more than he would have, to
which he responded "You might be surprised dear". I don't
think I will be. Besides, he just graduated from school
(well technically he graduates this coming week). He
worked at the school as a student job thing, so that is
also over. Today as his last day. He doesn't have the
money to give. He needs what money he has to survive until
he finds a job. He means well though.

He is so good to me :) I got flowers for the first time in
my life this year. Yes, I am 27 and NEVER got flowers
before. A few days after vday I got a dozen blue irises.
They were beautiful :) We've been together almost a year,
and I still can't believe that someone loves me like he
does. He knows all my issues (and trust me, there are some
BIG ones), he knows the problems they will cause, he knows
my weirdness LOL, and still he insists he loves me. He
told me the sweetest thing the other day. His father was a
lil ify about the whole thing (our relationship) since for
now it is long distance. DB's parents are divorced, and
his father never dated another woman, never wanted to.
DB's mom was it for him. DBs dad was drilling him a lil
one day and DB looked at him and said, "You know what mom
is for you? That is what she is to me." Ok, not that I
typed that out it seems really.. not that great.. but it
made me smile. Actually brought tears to my eyes. I have
never been loved like that. I can't imagine my life
without him. God I hope I'm right about this. I swore up
and down I was right about my ex... and obviously I wasn't.

I was talking to my grandmother today about DB. Just so you
all know, my family basically thinks I'm insane. They all
think I shouldn't move to TX and I should just stay here
and take care of my mother the rest of her life. And I get
alot of shit and guilt trips about my decision to move down
there. My gramma is good at these. She was ok though
today. I think she is finally getting it through her head
that as off now I am going. I know she just worries. And
I know she loves me. Sometimes she just goes to far. I'm a
grown woman and I have to do this.

Hmm, what else can I talk about.

OMG, yesterday I heard about THE most ... cold crime I have
ever imagined.
http://foxnews.com/story/0,2933,47361,00.html
Take a look if you want. It is just sickening. It is
scary that someone could actually do that. What is
happening to the world? To me, that is almost as scary, if
as scary, as the bombings that happened 9/11. I still
can't describe what I feel about it. I feel just... horror.

Ok then, on that happy note *chuckles* I'm signing off. I
hope everyone is having fun this weekend.

Be safe out there. :)


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