My Teenage Life
2001-05-09 15:47:45 (UTC)

Aon, Aon, Aon, Aon

As the title implies, I've had one of those "I can't stop
thinking about Aon" days.
Everytime I've been talking to me mates today, the
slightest thing has been reminding me of him.
I Didn't talk to him much last night :( but i
should/probably will talk to him tonight :)
god, it's so unfair - we have such a great friendship but
sometimes i wish he loved me as more than a friend :( It's
so not fair :(

I spoke to him yesterday evening, but didn't manage to get
on at 10pm which is when we usually talk. I Was in me room
assembling me computer workstation and I got a text. It was
off him - yay. He said he'd talk to me tomorrow and that
but he seemed really emotional somehow, to me. But then
again, sometimes I think he's upset and he isn't. But he
did say he wished I could phone him cos he could of done
with talking to me or something.
So i went downstairs to email him from the tv and asked him
what was wrong and that, and he emailed me back saying
something like
"im fine really, there's nothing much the matter, I'll talk
to you tomorrow" etc.
I emailed him back and said "ur fine REALLY? there's
nothing MUCH the matter? If u don't wanna talk about it,
that's ok but i wish you would, but ok, ill talk to you
tomorrow..." etc
I hope he's ok and not upset about something, cos it really
seemed to me like he was.
I'll ask him when he comes on anyway.

So anyway, in between constantly thinking of Aon, I've had
quite a good day. Been boring though - the level of
boredness I am at has reduced me to translating the names
of my favourite bands, their album names and all their song
titles into spanish!!! my god how sad!!!!
It all started when we were preparing for the spanish
speaking yesterday, and Louise said that if he asked her
about her friend, she'd say me, and if he asked what I
liked, she'd say "dave grohl, ronnie o'sullivan and verde
dia" for green day. She mentioned it again at dinner, so i
found the offspring, blink 182 and foo fighters (Well had
to keep it as foo combatientes) and then started the whole
album and song thing - god i must have no life! lol I'm
only doing it in school though, not at home.
I Think it's louise is having the effect on me, im not
bored when with heath or natalie.

Ashley was looking really nice as ever today, I nearly
walked into him twice! and not on purpose - I swear!!!
It was a bit embarrassing though.

At break, heather and louise normally go and sit in the
canteen, and me and natalie go with all our other mates.
Heather doesn't like Louise, and only goes because she
can't stand up for herself, and louise thinks she has some
sort of "authority" over Heather and makes her go
everywhere with her. So me and natalie are on heather's
side now so we help her out. So seeing as Heather has
started coming out at break, Louise can;t go in the
canteen. Yesterday we walked around and talked, but today
me and natalie decided we should go with our other mates,
even if louise isn't talking to hardly any of them. Heather
said she'd come with us, so we headed over to the place
where we all meet up and talk. Louise followed us and
went "why are you coming here?" so i went "we always come
here" so she went "uumm...I'm going to find Katie (her mate
who no-one likes and who i'm not talking to) to go the
toilet" and walked off quickly, before my mates who she
isn't talking to came over.
I wasn't being nasty to her, but I don't see why I should
change my plans for her, plus - if i didn't hang around
with them all at break, I'd hardly see them because none of
them are in my class, 1 or 2 are in 1 or 2 of my classes
but that's it. Also, everytime I talk to one of them (the
main one being Claire, they had massive arguments in the
past and Louise is scared of Claire actually) she says to
me afterwards "why were you talking to her when you were
with me and you know i ain't talking to her?"
that really annoys me because I Don't see why I should
ignore my mates because of her and her starting some stupid
argument with them months ago.
God!!! It's so annoying! So if he wasn't like that as much,
I would sympathise with her. Plus, she always goes on to me
about Katie (even though she knows we're not talking, and
haven't been for AGES now, all because I told her that my
bf of the time had been sick down the phone to me - and she
never spoke to me again. I wouldn't have minded but
everyone was slagging hre off but I Was the one who
defended her and didnt join in cos i felt sorry for her!!)
even though she says she doesn't like her anyway!! she well
does, she always slags Katie off behind her back, but she
always goes out with her at weekends and stuff, if you
REALLY DO NOT like someone you don't go out with them all
the time, and it;s not that katie asks her and she feels
sly saying no - she asks katie herself.
WEll she can go screw herself for all I care.

Aftre she did go off to "the toilet" with katie, she
appeared with katie and this other girl laura and the
biggest slag in the school (harsh, i know but once she was
in a taxi and had no money so she said to the taxi
driver "i'll give u a suck if u let me off with the money"
that's just sick! she's also the most unpopular girl in the
school too, so maybe she's just doing it for attention - i
don't know)
But if louise is going to start hanging around with slaggy
people like that....she can get lost!!!
Seein as i'm on the subject of sexual things, Louise
reckons that when she was 12, she went to haven and met
this lad from Ireland called Liam. He was 15 at the time
and she says she was going out with him and stuff. She was
still "going out with him" last year even though she only
got a letter off "him" hardly ever and they NEVER spoke on
the phone. (I say off "him" cos only one person has ever
seen these letters (and only read one) and they are all
typed and liam had a sister called lyndsey who was 10 at
the time, who louise was friends with and writes to a lot
and we've all seen lyndsey's handwritten letters hmm)
anyway apparently, she only started talking about Liam when
she started hanging around with me (a time when I had a bf
and hung around with a lot of lads outside school) and i've
been told by a few people they reckon she only did it to
fit in with me, so Liam is probably Lyndsey's big bro who
she never even talked to, OR she made him up totally OR
lyndsey's big bro who she just talked to.
Anyway, last year she told me she had had sex with Liam. it
must have been when she met him because she hasn't seen him
since, which would mean she was TWELVE and he was FIFTEEN??
C'mon, I don't know one 15 yr old who would have sex with
a 12 year old.Plus, she isn't the type to have sex.
So basically, it's a load of bull.

The first time I wrote one of these, I said the first few
would be really long, and although this is only the third,
Im beginning to think they'll all be really long!

oh, I love Annraoi (aon)
I really should stop feeling like this, and love him as a
friend only, can't help it though.

Everyone I know who supports liverpool proper had goes at
me today about Sander Westerveld and his mistakes last
night against Chelsea, because they all know I love him.
My mate Andrew and Chris did this in particular.
I said to Andrew "shut up!! Players always have bad days,
I'd like to see you do better - anyway what are u saying it
to me for?"
and he went "cos ur the closest we can get to kicking off
at him"
thaanks, just cos i love him no need to tell me how crap he
is :(
He carried on all day though and I got really annoyed by
the end of dinner and walked ahead of him, then he tried 2
catch me up and apologised saying he was only joking with
me. Then paul came over and talked to me and we had a
little laugh so then I was ok when I went back over to
andy, louise and heathre who were waiting for me to finish
talking to paul.

lol paul was telling me i HAVE to cook in cooking on friday
cos he "doesn't want to make cheesecake on his own" lol how
sad does that sound! I said i would though, cos it'll be
the last itme we ever cook seeing as we leave school soon.

Found out kevin's staying on at 6th form 2day :( also found
out that he has an internet gf called claire, who he talks
to in this chatroom I used to go in, and he told me her
screename in it and I knew it but couldn't think why. Then
I remembered that she was the girl who messaged me ages ago
when Neil suddenly had to go to uni and still didnt have my
email address to get it from me for him and to tell me his
email address so we could keep in touch. I was like "wow,
kev's gf knows neil!!" lol i was really shocked, it's a
small world lol

:( Annraoi isn't on and i have to go offline in 5 mins :(
I bet he'll come on.........now. nope.
ok...................now. nope. ok in a few mins then and
ill be like "Noooooooo i gotta go"

I Can't wait til our night out after we leave school.
Heather and I are deffo going, and maybe louise. Also,
Heath asked MArk which would be really cool if he could
come, and i could just meet him then. we'll have a laugh
anyway and get totally bevvied - woooo!

Anyways, I'm going to go listen to Conjura De Uno,
Ignicion, o Ixnay en la Hombre by La Descendencia ;-) I
can't remember how to say smash, and americana isn't even
an english word let alone a spanish one lol

ta ta for now