2001-05-07 06:35:11 (UTC)

blah I am gonna be happy blah

Hello world. There's really just no other way to explain
the way I feel right now. Blah. Exhausted. Worn the hell
out. Don't know what to think/do/say so that I don't get
drilled by people anymore. Happiness is the answer, so I'm
putting on my poker face today. I am trying so damn hard
to cheer up, you know, that deep down cheer up, but I can't
do it. But at least the surface fools everyone else. It
works for now. I'm gonna try to smile a lot tonight until
i go to bed, even though no one is here to see it. But
thats the thing, I don't like talking to people because
they make it seem like I am doing it for them. To hell
with cheering myself up for their sake, I'll only do that
to shut them up. I am gonna do this for me because I am so
sick of this. Cheer up dammit, cheer up.