My thought of this week
A lot has happened this week that i cant actully put into words. I
am faced with a situation today, a situation of insecurity, of
uncirtanty, a situation of doubt, ..of... god knows what this is
called!!! Maybe we havent come up with a word of it yet. When I see
it from different peoples point of views, they all seem to "be the
best thing to do"........ but each one conflicts with the other. But
the worst part is that i feel as if everyone's "solution" to this
problem is against mine. My mind is as set as it was the first
time.....But when people talk to me about this, all they do is make
me more doubtfull not only on that "supposedly special and important"
4 letter word, but also on the other 4 letter word which is "Life".
If individuals have the right to live, they should be let to live it
the way they want and with who they want. It is their life after
all !! You come on this planet for a very short period of time.
Believe me, it really is short. You may say that "this man has lived
for 80 years or 90 years" but how much of that 80 years has he
actully lived for "himself". He has lived because he was told to live
in that way and do what others wanted him to. (In this context i
should have included a "she" as well, I know, but right now I feel
like the "he" in this situation (I am a MALE......))
Even after this weeks crutial meeting, where have i come? I still
feel hurt, i still feel that the world is my enemy, and i still feel
sometimes that i should never have thought about others as much as i
had. Can there be a fullstop to this .... i dont know.
I saw her today from a distance.....she looked so happy......Thats
the way i want her to be.....and thats the way i am going to try to
I think i have dont enough of swimming for today (in the collected
drops of the clear salty saline solution secreted by my lacrimal
glands) Just kidding..... i copied and pasted the meaning from
Take care dear diary