2001-05-05 21:54:53 (UTC)

whats going on?

i am reminded of that 4 non blondes song, "whats going
on?"..... i am just confused as usual today. its kinda
wierd. i have been so used to confusing thoughts RACING
through my head, but now that i am on medicine, its like I
am in tranquil confusion, because i can't think up ANYthing.
I am scared out of my mind because i think my mom is
gonna lock me up or something. ah, but like usual, i don't
know. I have been in a pretty good mood all day, i've not
felt totally WITH it the entire time, but its been nice for
a brief change. Hopefully I am pulling out of the last
depression state that I was dragging my feet through for a
week or whatever. I thought the medicine was supposed to
stop these swings..... eh but what do i know, i'm just an
18 year old kid looking for some answers. I might write
later today if i can think of something, but in tranquil
confusion i will remain indefinitely (as usual). Its gross
how this has all become a way of life.