Dreamer

My Life
2002-02-28 06:50:47 (UTC)

Church... talk to Darren

So lately, not much has been going on... Just school and
work... except... Tues was a late start because all the
underclassmen had to take the AIMS.... (hahaha), not that
it would have mattered, because I already passed it!
Anyways... so yesterday I worked forever, and then I came
home and watched 24... then I was in bed. (MY FIRST NIGHT
NOT TALKING TO DARREN:()
So today I woke up and wrote my outline for my research
project before I had to leave for school. That was soo much
fun, NOT! But I got ready went to school and sat in 1st and
2nd hours at the computer trying to write my rough draft,
as well as Ashley, and we can't really come up with
anything, so we just start typing in quotes because they
have to be in there anyways.
Then after school, which was a half day, I went to the
bank and got cash and then Amy called and said that we were
going to go to Subway for lunch. We met up at Subway and I
got a Subway Melt (thanks Darren for changing my mind)and
we just kind of sat and talked about nothing important.
They went to get custard, but i'm trying to be good on what
I eat, so I didn't go and came home and started to try and
work on my rough draft, but just ended up writing in more
quotes. Then the girls (Ashley, Amy and Lucy) came over
because I needed to the stuff I saved onto Ashley's disk
onto my computer so I could work on it, but they stayed
over and we looked through magazines and listened to music
and just had a fun time, which was really nice. When they
left I tried to work on it more but the computer was being
gay, so I just had to go to work. I went and worked until
6:00 when I was only supposed to work until 5:30 (aren't I
just the nicest person you know??) and then came home, ate
dinner and then left to go over to church. Oh yeah and
before that I had called Darren and Kim's sister answered
his cell phone... I was a little... how do you say it,
preterbed! But he said that he was going to come to church,
and when I got there he wasn't there. Come to find out, he
didnt' come until after is was over, which was ok, because
after we always go and hang out. So we all drove down to
Sonic and we got out and DeLynn was just being a
sweetheart. She was trying to make the baby kick for us and
stuff, but Hayden wasn't having it. She is just so cute!
And when we were at Sonic I was talking to Lucy and Amy
about Darren and about how I still miss him and about how I
feel and what is going on. Also about all the other stuff
(g-parents and such) that is going on and how it's really
hard to handle.
After that we left Sonic and Darren and I switched
trucks... this time we were driving on major roads, but he
trusts me, so he left me drive his baby. We drove around my
neighborhood a while and then we had to take Lucy home. So
me and Lucy in Darren's truck drive to her house and then
Darren and Amy follow us to her house and when we get
there, we swtich back trucks and we take Amy home.
I thought that maybe Darren had went home because I
didn't see him, but when I was pulling out of Amy's
neighborhood, he was coming in and turned around and
followed me. He'll always drive me home to make sure that I
am safe, but before I went home, I had to stop by the gas
station to fill up the truck. As I was pumping gas I talked
to Darren about stuff and then even when I was done, we
were still just talking. So we decided that we should at
least go to my house. So we drove to my house and then we
decided that we just wanted to talk about everything. He
put down the bed and we just kind of talked about how I was
feeling about him and the same about me, and how we are
better just being friends for now, but that those feelings
are still there (strongly on my part) and about everything
that I am going through and I just got to talk to him. He
also talked about Kim and how there is nothing between them
and that actually really comforted me because at least now
I know that he's not lying to me and now I just feel a lot
better.
I also feel like I could just talk to him and that felt
good because I wasn't holding anything back. I told him how
I felt and I told him how I might be going to Cali this
weekend because all of my mom's sisters were going to be at
her dad's and they wanted to go to and since it's my
birthday this Sat. my mom said something about going to
Disneyland. So I talked to Darren about that and decided
that if anyone goes with me and if this whole thing works
out, that he will be the one that goes with me, only
because we are really close friends and I hope that we get
closer. I'm not even sure if that is going to happen, but
we will see. Atleast I know that he wants to go and will go
if this whole thing works out.
When he said goodnight he gave me a hug out by the trucks
and then walked me to the door and then gave me another
long one, and then I was about to go in and we hugged
again... It felt so great just to have him there with me,
in my arms, I can't even describe it. It's not like it
didn't complicate feelings that I have though. So for now
we're just going to play it by ear and see what happens....
but I think it's just going to be friends for a while
anyways, and I'm ok with that. I was supposed to be home at
10:00, and I was home by 10:10, but I was out talking until
11:10, but Dad wasn't mad. :)
Anyways... I better get working on my 5-7 page research
paper rough draft... that should be tons of fun!!

Love Always,
~*~Me~*~

"The man that figures us women out, will have it made"




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