artistic vent!
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2001-05-05 04:38:19 (UTC)

diffrent is good!!!!!!

Ok, today i'm going to talk about something that has been
kindof getting to me lately, my day was normal, so instead
i'm going to climb up on this litte e-soupbox, and tell you
a little story....Ok, to begin with let me tell you about
my self. I am a 20 year old male from oklahoma, i come from
a family of athletes, raised in a school of no culture,
live in a city with no jazz...and this is a problem...why,
you ask. Because i am a jazz musician, artist, and just
plan nice guy, with an edge...that is important,..i'm not
the guy who got pick on at recess, i'm not the guy that did
the picking on, i'm the guy just blended in, but
didn't...if that makes since...and that in a nutshell is my
life story..i don't fit in where i live..i know no one that
like the music i like, one that appreciates art like i
do, no one that has respect like i do. and this is starting
to get to me, because..i've got friends plenty of them..i
have no enemies, and this is good...but one place my retro
way of life has got to in the girl department. Where
in the hell are all the girl with intrest like mine...i
can't find a single one...and this is starting to get to
me. now don't get me wrong i don't just sit around all day
long and look for "the One" girl that fits my perfect
description. I much according to my
roommates..but thats because no one can keep my attention,
no one i've met can give me that stimulation that would
keep me to stay together for more than 5 months. I don't
like going from one girl to another, and i'm not that
picky,but i've become that way, because i have dated so
many diffrent types of girls, and most are really great,
and we are still friends but, ..........where is that
girl.....that one that i wake up and think about, thats how
its supposed to be isn't it, i've never had that, and i'm
not closed off to it..i want it to happen, but it never
does...i wake up and think about lucky charms...thats not
right, a twenty year old guy shouldn't wake up and think
about lucky charms, especially if there is a girl that he
know wants him to wake up get dressed and come see
her...not wake up and eat two bowls of freaking lucky
charms....sigh...i don't know, i'm not ugly i've been told
several times i'm very attractive, and my roommate said
just today that i must have some magic powers to come home
with so many beautiful girls, and i don't have any magic
powers i just smile and be myself, and i always get the
girl, and i know that, and i hate that, because the girl
always, always fall before i do, and before i know it,
where practically married, and all i want to do is eat some
damn lucky charms...(mediforically speaking) i don't want a
relationship just for sex, i don't want to have to spend my
life saving on you (but i always have with the one that
were worth it), and there have been several girls that
were so great, but like i've started saying in the
begining, girls these days want the limp bizcuit loving,
abrcombie, and fitch wearing clones, and i'm sorry but i'm
not that way....i open the doors for girls, i pay for
dinner...and i even cook you dinner if your a good girl,
but girls these days don't give a rats ass about that, they
must not want sensitive, and caring, they want ruff and
tough, they want the guys that pick the fights, and by god
i'm not like that, and i wont be...i refuse. I'm going to
continue wearing my vintage 50's bowling shirts, and hats,
i'm going to continue to drive down the street with my
windows rolled down playing frank sinatra, i don't care if
the jeep next to me filled with snotty little girls laughs,
screw them,....hopefully one day they will learn that there
is such a thing as individuality, and they will se there
lacking this little personality trait..once they get a
personality...anyways..i just wanted to rant, and i
have,....alot...i'm sorry, this just a thumb on the hand
full of fingers finally telling his story....because
without would be surprised what you couldn't
do....(another analoge if were going to literal with
that), ....hmmm....ok, well i just wanted to say that...and
if you are a girl like i'm describing and you are like
me........just remember, keep your windows down, were your
hat the way you like it, and just be yourself, because
everyone is just a mirror, your the only real object, stay
that way......goodnight.......-matt