redstarfish2

No Matter How Hard I Try...
2002-02-27 20:21:11 (UTC)

all in one day...wow

hey! well, today has been alright for me, but not. lol. I'm
full of problems.
***
ok, first of all, this isnt really a problem but my dad is
moving back to Texas. I feel bad for the kids, moving
everywhere and all that. I mean they just tranfered
schools, made new friends, and now they are going back. I'm
sure it's a good thing for them also, they get to see their
father and i dont know if its close to where they live, but
maybe they get to see their old friends.
***
Matt and Ashlee broke up :( I feel so bad for him. He
really loved her and now he has to find the "old matt" to
get her back. I know him and he'll do anything to get her
back. What made me mad was that she couldn't even break up
with him herself. She had Andy do it. Last night Matt
wanted to kill Andy from the way he was talking. It wasn't
cool, but I hope he has calmed down. I guess this girl is
smart, using a friend of Matt's, I mean that completly puts
the blame on Andy. But it was a pretty sleezy thing to do.
This all happened last night. Hopefully, they get back
together. It'd be best for both of them.
***
I'm feeling better today. I wanna go to summer camp, JROTC,
I really hope I make the cut. The only problem is showering
with 3 other girls, it isn't a happy thought. I'd bring my
bathing suit but that's be a pretty sissy thing to do.
*sigh* But you never know, people from all over Florida, if
I'm single I could have a one week fling :) geez, i'm a
bad. lol. For those of you who don't know me, i'm a pretty
big flirt but I do try to stay behind the fine line of
flirting.
***
This girl rides my bus, and she's pretty annoying. For a
while I thought maybe she was human, I was in left field.
She's a burn out. I'm not gunna put names. On my way off
the bus she goes "get the fuck off the bus" it took
everything in me not to turn around, ask her if she was
talking to me, (which she OBVIOUSLY was because I was the
only one to get off from the middle, the otehr 2 sat in the
first seat) and slap her. But, my bus driver hates me cuz
I'm "different" in other words, cuz I'm tall, skinny, and
not preppy. I would have hit the girl but all I thought was
that she isn't worth a 10 day suspension and being kicked
off the bus. I don't need to take comperhensive exams in
every class and don't need that crap on my record. Unlike
her, I have things going for me. I have a future.
***
A freind of mine really kinda upset me today. I'm not one
for letting what people say get under my skin but it really
did. Everyone cares what people say, whether they admit it
or not. They always wonder why the person thinks that or
what they did to that person, even I'm that way but I never
let it get to me. She was telling me about a friend who was
thinking about running away. Now, I KNEW who this person
was before she told me. I asked her who and she said "I
can't tell you, you'll go run to a teacher." Mind you
whenever I find out someone does drugs or is running away I
NEVER report them, I'm not that way. I never reported when
some girl slapped me in 7th grade, I'm not a tattle-tale.
You wanna know why she said it? Cuz I don't do drugs, smoke
or drink anymore. (And dad if you're reading this, don't
flip, please?!) It makes me mad that because I'm not a burn
out loser and I care about my future, and somehow manage to
pull of good grades I'm classified as a goody-two-shoes.
That isn't fair. And for those of you who really know me,
you know I'm far from a goody-two-shoes. But you know what?
Whatever, she can go......
***
Well, I'm gunna get going now.
Quote:
"Why don't you just open your eyes and see what is
right in front of you instead of searching for the un-
reachable?"




Ad: