Loveridden

Unholy and Dirty and Beautiful Me
2002-02-26 06:09:43 (UTC)

I haven't mentioned.

BaD. isn't dead. Some sick ass bastard started that awful
rumour...B has a lot of enemies, but there are a lot of
people who love him too....it was a terrible joke.

RoP & JeP's wedding was super nice. D did call me back,
confirmed to me that B wasn't dead and told me he wanted to
take separate cars to the wedding. So, ya...I went alone.
Hung out with D and it was cool. We went in his truck to
pick up film, sat together & talked about life & stuff.
He's seeing someone new :( that made me sad a little, but I
am slowly forgetting any hopes I had before of the
slightest chance of us getting back together. Also made me
think...that guy doesn't know WHAT he wants..every time I
see him he's with someone new so...ya...Anyways, at the end
of the night he just handed me my coat check ticket and he
was gone.....didn't say goodbye, saw his truck leaving and
it kinda hurt watching him drive away. OH WELL, it was
really crowded at the place (there were a bunch of other
weddings there!) so I figure he was in a hurry and just
took off. We each took a roll of film on my camera and
we're supposed to trade doubles.....I hope he pulls through
on that at least, I only have a roll of the ceremony, he's
got the reception. It ended early, the wedding &
reception..I went back to town and met up with a bunch of
friends for a lil party. D prolly went to fuck his girl.
She's 27 btw!!! I overheared him talking to R, saying that
he'd wanted to bring her to the wedding.....after he asked
me to be his date AND then gave me the shaft. What is that??
I'm realising that my dreams of him were just pipe dreams,
what a waste of time that was. But ya, it was so cool to
see R getting married.....wow. Weird but so good!!!!

I haven't mentioned that CoG brought up the Problem I/we
had......he actually asked me on Friday if I'd gotten a
call from the clinic......I knew he'd bring that up!! I
asked him if we could talk about it later, we were in a
crowded bar & he's in town for the week so I'll give him a
call. It didn't seem to change anything between us LOL, he
even asked me if I needed a date for the wedding.....was
pretty upset when I told him D was kinda my date (though
there were 2 extra seats, people who didn't show up so
really D & I could have each brought a date!!!!). There's
all kinds of probs between D's family & C so maybe bringing
him wouldn't have been so good. Anyways, C was drunk and
being stupid. He told me that he was worried I'd get
involved with "that family" again.....LOL FAT CHANCE OF
THAT!......saying that he thinks I'm the "coolest" (????)
and that he wishes he could be with me (??????). ANYWAYS,
ya....so I'll give him a call this week to discuss the
Problem. The problem is gone for me. If I should end up
sleeping with HIM again, I'll definately use a
condom....though I'm sure JaC was the cause of it.....maybe
MaD was.....ewww, they were both dirty and I was so
naive!!!! I really doubt that C would have been the cause.
We hardly ever had unprotected sex, really just the one
time..that was so bad. So ya, eww. I hate that. It's gone
though, I learned my lesson!!! At least I've never gotten
pregnant! I always take my pill..

~loveridden71



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