Tinker Bell's daily amount of goofy
2002-02-25 22:41:59 (UTC)

Of music and me: the violin non-virtuoso...

Well, I always wanted to learn how to play an
instrument....My favourite musical instruments have always
been piano and violin.
But not like my parents thought they'd be wasting money on
me, I mean, they never saw how much I loved music, and I
never expressed myself as someone who wanted to learn to
play anything, and less as a 7 year old, which is the right
moment to start if you wanna get somewhere. And if you're
gonna spend money, well, you better get somewhere! It's
sort of like an invesment.
But like I said, I never did, maybe because that's the
kind of idea you may have as a kid, and reject it as once
because it's the sort of thing you don't see as possible.
But then again, there were so many things I didn't see as
possible, which now I understand and they're so easy now!
And lots of those things, I understood myself! I'm self
taught in so many things, meaning that I didn't have any
aid from a person. It was always me, and a book, or me and
TV (or the internet, now), or me and an encyclopaedia, or
just me...

So now I look back, and I feel so frustrated, thinking
that I can't go back to when I had 7 years old, and learn
to play the instrument of my choice.
Why? Can't I just learn because I just want to? Because
I'd like to play?

I don't, and repeat, because you need to be very emphatic
about this, don't want to be a virtuoso, nor a
proffessional concert player, nor a musician or composer.
I just want to play, for the sake of it. I want to see
what I can do, and I want to be challenged, and I want to
reach my own victory, as I see it; just play because. Or
play for fun, or friends, if you really feel like needing a
reason to support your own impulses.
I want to play for me, and hopefully, learn by myself to
do so.

So, then I made up my mind. I'm gonna save my money, and
buy an instrument.
Since my fave are piano and violin, first I started with
piano...but I don't own a piano. So the few lessons on
theory I learnt were quite useless, and I wasted the idea.

How come I never thought a violin was cheaper and smaller
than a piano, is beyond me.

How come I thought just NOW that I could already have one
if I thought about it before, is also beyond me, but I
think me liking Sherlock Holmes NOW, just may have
something to do with it, because as most readers know,
Holmes was devoted to music, and played the violin
himself...and well.

I'm gonna start saving my money from now on, and then
we'll see.

But mark my words, I won't give up.