humming bird

my F***ed up head
2002-02-24 06:36:38 (UTC)

i'm sick of pissed off boys

honestly.. this is so stupid,ok first of all i got in a
fight with jason becuz megan called jason and asked him if
he would consider hanging out with robby and art.. he flips
out and gets pissed at me for leting her i spose
to like fucking monitor my friends or something? and so
yeah whatev he was like well i still wanna chill with u so
call me at 8 15 cuz i'm taking my own car and if u call
then i'll leave and we can chill and if u dont then i'll
just stay here... well it ends up that all of his lights r
out on his car so then scott drives him ( by that way i
mean to candy's surprise b-day party)...well see earlier i
had asked him if he was just gonna be pissed at me if we
hung out and like ignore me and he goes no if i was that
pissed i wouldnt even ask u to come over yeah they
like had "just gotten there" at 8 15 when they were spose
to be there at like 7 and scott didnt want to leave ..well
is it my fault that his dumbass got there an hour late? so
yeah and he goes well can u do anything tomorrow or
whatever and i'm like i dunno call me if u want to do
something and i'll let u know if i can or not and he goes
why dont u just call me if u can and i was like i dunno it
just seems like u dont want to chill... u know cuz maybe he
had gotten so pissed that he decided to tell me that so he
didnt have to chill with me or something and he flips out
hands scott the phone and i go scott just tell him that if
he wants to do something and isnt to pissed then to call me
tomorrow and he goes ok and i'm like bye... ugh! he first
of all gets mad that i'm gonna hang out with robby and
them two nights in a row and then leaves me open to do
just that and god it has to be CANDY"S of all ppl.. cuz
see...scott is dating maggie and candy and maggie r friends
and liek when me and jason broke up he spent alot of time
with scott and candy and maggie and like candy was jasons
like "signifcant other" and there was the possibility of
them hooking up and like going out and i woulda flipped
becuz that was when he told me that he dint want a
relationship.. but that would basically have meant ( if
they had gone out) that he just didnt want a relationship
with me! but oh he can have one with someone else and just
that just pisses me off that it was even a possibility so
if i see him tomorrow i'm gonna say something about it..
becuz i hate it that we're not going out and yet we get
into these stupid ass tiffs and i hate going to bed mad at
him.. or like in an argument and having the last time that
i talk to him be like us yelling at eachother.. but goddd
CANDYS house i bet she isnt even pretty, i bet she is ugly
as hell and i swear if they hook up i'll beat her ass..i
swear i will pound her like fucking no other.... omg i dont
even want to think about it... how the hell could he have
gotten dragged into it when he knew he was spose to be
chillin with me, we had this like planned since like
wednesday why the fuck didnt he jsut say no i cant i'm
sorry or when they had to take scotts car just be like dude
i'm not going cuz i told julie we'd chill tonight and he's
all like oh well candy thinx i'm coming i cant just not
come and hello if it is a surprise party then why the hell
did she know about it? ugh and he's like how can u consider
him a friend when u've known him for two weex and i'm like
cuz i do, i didnt think about this earlier, but he hasnt
known candy all that long and he considers her a friend
and he was like yeah well it'll start out as friends and
then turn into more about me and robby ...umm to bad it
went in reverse..we started out as more then friends and
ended up as friends becuz i like am in love with jason and
so wait then uhh does it mean that u and candy r gonna
start out as friends and turn into more...cuz he was all
like i'm a guy and i know he wasnt ust like uhhhh ok and
iwas liek yeah pretty much well i'm a guy and i know that
that isnt what he has in mind..ok not every fuckin guy in
the world is like him and not every fucking guy in the
world is gonna wanna get with me all of the time, it is
possible for a guy to be like hey julz whats up baby and
thne i tell him aint nothing gonna happen and the guy be
like its cool ya know! and well in case every guy does
think alike then if he jsut foreshadowing what the next
fucking chapter of our dramatic-pathetic-wanna-be-teen-love-
novel holds that he's gonna ditch me and go for
candy?!?!?!?!? omg am i insanse if any one read this am i
crazy cuz thats what i feel like and liek art and robby
were all like the so fuckin stupid u know and yeah i know
but i cant let go of this kid i am like in love with him
and then oh then robby gets pissed becuz some girls call
him and want him to come over and art doesnt want to go so
he cant go and he turns all pissy bout the whole
boys being pissed business.... it's not working out to well
for me ugh but whatev... and why do i love this kid so
much..why cant i just be like dude fuck u fuck off .. or
better yet why do we have to fight at all why cant we just
get along, god he drives me crazy sometimes i wonder if its
all worth iti dunno whatev i'm gonan go tho........julz

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