Ad 2:
2002-02-22 01:24:29 (UTC)


Her: but i did want to talk about a few things
Her: if youwere up to talking to me.
Me: whatever
Her: i wanted you to know that i waasn't conciously hiding
behind matt
Her: i don't think i am.
Her: i did not fuck the first person thats atracted to me
Her: i actually like him
Me: you've been reading my diary?
Her: yea
Her: did you not want me to?
Her: if you don't i wont
Me: no that's fine...
Me: I just didn't think you were still reading it
Her: are you sure
Me: if I didn't want anyone reading it I would make it
Her: why did you never tell me that you liked magic or
Her: or anything like that
Me: because I never really explored it much untill I
started hanging out with rose more
Her: i feel like the whole past year was a lie.
Her: i don't know anything about you
Me: don't feel that way... I never hid anything from you
Her: i guess i never really did. i knew that you liked
computers but that was it
Me: I want us to be able to hang out together and try and
know each other better....
Me: I know you're seeing someone and your happy and I'm
glad your happy... I'm not out to wreak that for you
Me: but you've got to let me get use to being around you
without throwing him into the mix
Her: how can we do anything when you don't even want to
Her: or do you feel comfertable doing it now
Her: i don't want any of this to sound bad
Me: I didn't want to talk because you hadn't sent me that
letter you promised
Her: im not trying to be mean
Her: im sorry
Me: I don't understand what happend still... one day we're
fine and the next you say you don't love me anymore
Her: alot of shit had happend that week and the week after
Me: just days before you were talking about getting a
tattoo with my name in chinese on you
Her: we wern't fine
Her: i was just acting like it
Her: and i didn't really realize that
Me: I wish you would of talked to me
Her: i wasn't trying to keep anything form you.
Her: i know but i just didn't feel that their was a reason
Me: *sigh*
Her: i didn't want the relationship whether it was right
or not
Her: i was right
Me: why?
Her: your doing much better without me even being in you
Me: hahhaaahah
Me: yeah right
Me: I'm dropping out of school
Her: thats why i think i should just stay out of it
Me: I haven't sleep right in months
Her: your learning who you are
Me: no I'm not
Me: I have no clue who I am now
Me: I thought i knew before but without you I have no clue
Her: but you did then
Her: ??
Me: you were the only reason I stayed in texas... if it
hadn't been for you I"d be in tennessee right now
Me: I was planning on leaving not too long after I had met
you... things changed
Her: i thought i had always told you that i wanted you to
do what you wanted to do. and to not change anything for me
Her: i really wish you would of
Me: I didn't change for you
Her: done what you wanted
Me: I changed because I was happy here for once...
Me: I changed for ME
Me: this town make me misserable...
Me: But with you I was happy
Me: Is that the real reason you wanted to break up with
me? because you thought I'd be better off without you?
Me: I really wish you would tell me one reason instead of
all 100
Her: no that isn't the real reason
Her: i don't have one reason
Me: *sigh*
Her: i don't even know. all that i know is that it didn't
feel right and i didn't want it even if it was going to
feel right
Me: why?
Me: guess you aren't going to answer me
Me: ok well I'm leaving....


Eh... I'll write on this later but right now I'm already
late for being at a friends...