Dave's Mental Meanderings
2002-02-21 12:18:04 (UTC)

People I Hate...

Well, 3 months ago, I wrote a journal entry
entitled "People I Hate" whose purpose was to enumerate
several general types of people whom I think deserve a
quick visit from the angel of death, and to provide
examples of each type. I only talked about one type of
person, however, because I was tired as all hell. Well, I
said I'd write again soon regarding more people I hate, so
here it is folks, the long-anticipated sequel.

I realized that nearly all of the categories of people I
hate can be summed up into one large, general category:
phonies. To me, a phony is a person who projects an image
that inaccurately reflects who the person really is. One
sub-category of phonies that really pisses me off is people
who try to gain favor of members of the opposite sex by
inspiring pity for themselves. As a credit to the fairer
sex, I will say that this quality is almost 100% unique to
males, from what I've seen. For this reason, I will write
this journal entry addressing these bastards as males.

Guys who try to inspire pity are generally not appealing
enough to be noticed by girls. So instead of trying to be
genuinely humorous, daring, or interesting, they constantly
discuss how they've been unfairly treated in the past and
how they're not as fortunate as most guys are. If done
correctly, this tactic usually will get the guy some
attention from girls, but for the wrong goddamn reasons.
It's one thing to throw a couple exaggerated anecdotes in
when you're trying to impress a girl, but to make it look
like everybody, male or female, has been fucking you in the
ass since the day you were born is just pathetic. It might
make a girl feel sorry for you, and it might even make a
girl feel very close to you if they listen to you talk
about how every one of your ex girlfriends did nothing but
walk all over you, but what does that prove? It proves
that you're a slimy, lying son-of-a-bitch who doesn't place
any limits on how low you'll stoop to get a girl's

In case you aren't familiar with this type of people, here
is a common example of a situation in which these guys are
sure to leap at the chance to inspire pity in girls:
When a group of guys and girls are hanging out, and most of
the guys are doing something even remotely macho, like
throwing a football. In this case, the slimy bastard will
tell all the girls how silly it is when guys act macho, and
he'll surely cite the fact that, although he's a pansy who
could get his ass kicked by a large squirrel, he doesn't
act macho all the time. This particularly pisses me off.
Sometimes, guys do things that are inherently macho,
especially when they're drunk. If you can't cut loose and
just be a guy every now and then, that doesn't make you a
really nice guy, it makes you a fag. I don't mean a gay
person, I'm using the word fag to refer specifically to
phony bastards like I'm describing.

Here's another example, to which I was an eye-witness less
than a month ago:
There were a bunch of us at a friend's apartment drinking,
and one guy passed out before anybody else, so my friend
Luke and I were joking about fucking with him while he was
passed out. Sure, fucking with the guy that passes out
first is macho and chauvenist, but it's what drunk guys
do. If you don't hurt the poor sap, there's nothing wrong
with a little fun. Anyway, we didn't end up doing anything
to him, but while we were discussing things that would be
funny to do to him, he reveals that he's not really passed
out by saying "What I think is funny is how you think I'm
passed out." First of all, faking being passed out so the
girls there forget how much of an ass he is and take pity
on him for passing out is REALLY fucking lame. Second of
all, what does he think he's proving by revealing that he
heard our whole conversation? Luckily, Luke responded with
about the only thing that could totally throw his surprise
comment back in his face - Luke instantly belted out "YEAH,
it wasn't for drunks like Luke, fags like the one in
question would get away with this shit even more than they
do now.

I guess the reason that I'm writing this is that I've been
noticing more and more lately how phony people are, and it
pisses me off. If you are a friend of mine, you probably
know who the person that I just described is. Good. I've
got nothing to hide, and I would gladly give that person a
piece of my mind if necessary. Guys like that who pretend
to be better people than guys who act somewhat macho every
now and then are such dirty fucking opportunists, it makes
me sick. So if you are the person I referred to in the
last paragraph, and you have somehow found my journal entry
devoted exclusively to slandering you and people like you,
I have one thing to say to you. I quote Axl Rose, from
Guns 'N' Roses: "You wanna antagonize me? Antagonize me
motherfucker! Get in the ring motherfucker! I'll kick
your bitchy little ass, punk!"

Now, to all of those people I know who are true to
themselves when it comes to the way they act around other
people - thank you. There is no better way to show respect
to a person than to be yourself around them, and to let
them decide what they think of the real you. Honesty and
straight-forwardness are far too underrated these days. So
for all of those people who have enough dignity and self-
respect to show their true selves to me, I truly do
appreciate it. If there is one thing I have learned, it's
this: if you just be yourself and act the way you really
feel, a lot of people might dislike you, but the friends
you make will be your true friends, because they see how
you really feel about life and they obviously see something
appealing about you.

That's all for now folks, until next time.