moshingkow

the expunged refuse of my evil mind
2002-02-20 04:54:42 (UTC)

frustrated!

get me out of this fucking room. im going insane. i dont
know why. my mom just was yelling atme for half an
hour about sat stuff. i had to get off the phone with
morgan. now no one is home, or not picking up. i think
im going crazy. i just punched myself and have been
poking this bigass cut i have on my finger with
scissors. i even was scratching at my wrists, hoping
that i would slip. FUUCk. i need something, but i dont
know what. i think i need morgan. i need her here now.
i feel nautious. i swear to god i need help. i punched
myslef pretty damned hard. harder then ive ever been
punched anyway. i feel so sick right now. i dont know
why. im fucking scared for my sanity right now. god, i
wish some one would just call, or im me so i can get
my mind off of my situation. FUUUCK. ishould be happy
wright nwo., i cant take it anymore. this is killing me. i
cant stay nautious. i cant stay sick, im gonna die. i cant
take it. i think i need to get out of the house. but no. im
gonna see morgan in eleven hours, and thirty five
minutes. i hope. i need to see her tomarow. just to see
her. just to feel better. i am soooooo stressed out. why
the fuck did my mom have to lay all this shit on me?
AAAAAGAh kill me now!! fucking take a knife to my throat
and pull. i want it to end now. i feel like diei ng i feel so
sick. i dont think that im gonna have a very sane life. im
gonna grow up to be a bum on the street who talks to
inviible companions. a fucking pschitzo. i think ill kill
myself if i go crazy. fuck.. im done.


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