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2002-02-19 14:47:10 (UTC)

Shrink Appointment

I've got a shrink appointment Monday. I hate going to that
place... The receptionists are so rude. I wanna hit them
in their faces whenever they give me the I-know-you're-
crazy-so-that-means-I-get-to-treat-you-like-shit look.

I didn't choose to be Bi-Polar

I didn't choose to need medicine and help and support

I can't say I didn't choose to try to end my life, and I
can't say that I didn't choose to introvert myself because
of all the bullshit I've put up with and all the times I've
been burned, because I did have a choice in all of that and
at times I hate myself for making those choices and other times
I think they were the right things to do.

Speaking of burned, another choice I made was to burn myself and now
I've got scars to remember it by. I don't do it anymore, though. I
have no need to do it anymore.

I guess I wanted physical pain to match my mental pain and
now I have physical scars instead of just emotional ones.

There goes another mood swing again.

I didn't have any medicine this morning. All out and the
pharmacy won't let me have my medicine for less than 122.50
until I get to my dads and get that insurance card.


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