.Scream Your Dream.

Emo Violence
2002-02-18 05:46:33 (UTC)

weekend in review...

oh my god, i have so much to write, its a little after 12
(sunday night/monday morning) i will go chronilogically
starting with friday and then random thoguhts thrown inat
hte end.

friday, chilled all day, no big deal, went to show around
6pm, (had huge scam for sleeping over mom's house tonight,
becasue shes away and wanted to have freinds over after the
show) plan wokred oddly enough, but the shwo was cool,
leslie, jb, jeremy and someother kids were rockin out to
junior, i got into it too, they played amazingly, better
then i ever saw before, i did the door for a while, and ol'
christina winter came, and she wanted to do the door, so i
let her (pretty much for the rest of the nigth untill sachi
stepped in at the end) i went to the pizza gallery with
clint zac and bobby, i was nervous because i guess, i dont
know why but i was, i never talk to bobby, oh well, anyway,
rest of the show went by uneventfully, i saw some kids,
talked to radka and eric and todd and those guys, dont liek
em much but oh well. told some kids to stop my house after
the show, show is over, i get a ride with jb, leslie,
jeremy, and bill(?) and they chill at my house, jb and
jeremy arnt straight edge so they drank with me, we were
playing brand new, and my brother had maybe 8 people over
and had some rap and pop on in the side of the house, it
was low key, but ok, caitlyn and annie came later, so did
jono and jason, so we are all chillin in the back, talkin,
i had about 4 drinks maybe, and was gettin a little silly,
i sorta forgot about asking Junior to come back after the
show, and didnt expect them to, but they did, they mustve
came through teh house and appeared on the back patio. we
were just chillin, but i was drunk. everyone talked for a
while, and jb his girl and their crew left, (caitlyn and
anne michelle had gone before clint bobby and zac got
there) so it left Junior, jason and jono and me which was
sorta weird, cause it was teh kenentt kids drinking, (well
drunk) and delaware sober as sober can be. i was dum in
front of zac and ended up being very embarrassed, so fuck
that, god i like that boy so much, its fucked up.

anyway, i passed out somewhere and spent the night at my
mom's house, and everyone else left.
saturday, woke up, groggy, but no hang over, i didnt even
get sick. went to lunch at dairy queen wiht alyss adn alcia
for a starletta meeting. we ate some chicken, and abe
hooked us up with a free butter scotch sundae. (that was
hot) and went home, i get increasingly nervous (my brother
has 11 cases of beer and bottles of hard liquor for a party
tonight, expecting over 50 kids) we go to my aints and
chill and eat some dinner, i am very nervous, tell my dad
im goin to the movies, ben says somthing like that, we go
back to the house, people start commin around 8:30 LOTS of
people, dozens, kids i know, kids i dont know, ALL POPULAR,
a whos who of who matters at KHS, including UV basketball
players, and some college kids too. damn it was THEE party,
goes on for a few more hours, im mixin drinks, keepin it
straight, the house is packed, every room in the 1st floor
adn basement and hallways have people in them, everyone is
drinking (the hallways were unbearbly crowded) a little
before 11pm, my fuckin dad shows up, it didtn even look
like a party, maybe 2 cars on linden circle (the rest on
washington and linden street ect) we were HOLDIN IT DOWN
sooo well, no lights on really, and music wasnt heard
outside, so my dad pulls up and ben talks to him for a
while, dad knew about the party, he comes in and starts
tellin kids to leave, kids are runnin everywhere (quickest
way to get 100 kids out of a house.... use the windows) so
there, it was quick, and i was UPSTAIRS, i was supposed to
be at the movies, rememebr. dad left shortly after, taking
no alcohol... i came downstairs, my brother is pissed, adn
we clean up a little, then get out of there with chandler
and head to andrew turner's, chill there for a little,
dispose of trash, and bite the bullet and go home. we
didnt get crap, my dad was too mad or somthing, i dont
know, i stayed away till about 3am on the computer, mainly
talking to zac...

zac starts talking about clint, well not ONLY clint, hes
talking about rachel too, and how they fucked in bobbys
living room and are now back together, well fuckin damn,
did i wanna know this??? HELL NO!! i had made it a personal
goal to never know about clint's sex life (just too
disturbing) and there zac goes, tellin me hes fuckin rachel
again, damn damn damn. this mesed up my mind... then zac
talks about how close junior is, and this and that, how
they talk about girls they knock and this and that. made
me uncomftable and reluctant to ever tell zac anything
again, apparently nothing is sacred between a band, not
even sex with someone you love. i felt a little bad for
poor zac, he obviously isnt goin around knockin girls, and
all the otehr guys are. i think he gets intimidated and
jealous sometimes, especially with clint and rachel, i know
he likes her, its fucked up though, the whole situation is
FUCKED UP, we started to talk abot religion and how a man
made bond - mariage - is suppsoed to be more sacred then
natural desires - sex. and one should be ashamed to partake
in natural human desire - sex - withough first partaking in
*cough*bullshit*cough man made bond - mariage. so
whatever, i wanted to discuss but i dont think zac did, all
in all, it was a very odd converstion with lots of stuff i
never should have been told, so go figure. needless to say,
i had a bitch of a time getting to sleep even though it was
3am

wake up on sunday, hear ben and dad arguing, great i think,
just great, i cant even sleep in on a fuckin sunday, why is
my door open anyway? well my dad took my cell phone, jerk
off. he was pissed, and he took my brothers cell and truck
keys, fuck that shit, my brother used his spare key and we
went over to clean up the house, it wasnt that bad, we
mopped some, it looks nicer then before mom left. then we
talked to dad, and he wanted us to come work, so we did,
cause he was mad and had our cells, and i worked fuckin all
day, i didnt even clock in, that bastard, it sucked
actually, finally we come home, i feel sad and weird about
the whole weekend, definately weird, we go to see my
grandma, come home, and im online now.

god everything feels so far away, the show on friday feels
like a week away, though it was 2 days, having a good 100
people in our house, feels distant too. eveything, weird.

at elast we ahve one more day off. i was gonna go into
random thoughts but i dont feel like it, its gonna be 1 in
about 10 minutes and im tired. im copying zines with alyss
tommrow which promises to be fun.

by the way, saves the day through being cool is by far the
nicest and most tasteful incert layout ive ever seen in my
life, enough to inspire me to also purchase the vinyl
version.

end of story. a series of late nights, i cant wait till
mom comes home, dad is killin me here.

xoxox
sarah