listen to my silences
bad day gone good
yesterday started out bad. i woke up dizzy and didn't go
to two and a half of my classes. the only reason i went to
the last one and a half was because i had to work. i came
home and called jon because i wasn't going to be able to
see him, but he wasn't home. so i left a message.
then i got on here and wrote about him and that made things
much better. and also jamie and i talked. i apologized
and then she did and it was great. we're all better.
i went to work and called him on break. i couldn't talk
long, and when we hung up it kinda, no really, sucked. but
then like fifteen minutes later he came into work to see
me. it was great.
he is wonderful.
today has been...all right. we had a half day, so that was
good. i'm getting ready to go to the cemetary though. the
first anniversary of anthony's death is tomorrow. what a
wonderful v-day huh. and i haven't been to colin's grave
since the funeral. almost two years now. i need to go.
i'm going to anthony's. i don't know about colin's
though. i don't know if i'm ready still. afterwards i'm
going to pick up jon and his sis and take them home. we
can't do anything though cause he had a full day of school
and i have to work. *sigh* and tomorrow i am getting my
hair fixed. how was i to know i would have plans??? i
never dreamed it. but i'll see him at guard. for now, i'm
off. later all.
final thought: i'll never break your heart, i'll never make
you cry, i'd rather die, than live without you
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