This is me and how my life goes.
2001-04-27 06:54:41 (UTC)

closed up

Dear Journal,
Yet again my mother has succeeded in pissing me off in less
than five minutes. We used to have so much to talk about and
she never ever use to be able to upset me that quick.
Sometimes I think she's doing it intentionally, like she has
a bad day or something and she is just determined to piss me
off. You know I do her a favor by not telling her about my
problems sleeping, and my nightmares about David and trying
to focus on school, which i'm doing really well in. I know
she already has so much to deal with so I don't want to
burden her with my problems and then she comes home and
just... damn it now i'm crying and i'll sit up and think
about this whole damn situation all night and it won't even
bother her. Maybe it's just me? But I don't......
AHHHHHHHH!!!!! Damnit listen to her she's just
has so much to say tonight. Why does she tick me off like
this? Never ever has she made me feel this way. I mean our
relationship was great, I mean she used to make me mad but
not as much as she does now. Maybe because we never get to
spend anytime together and when we do she's tired and all
pissy. I just want things to be the way they used to. I want
to talk to her, I want to tell her everything about David
but I can't because it's like... She's always acting so
strong, like nothing ever hurts her. I mean she shows
emotion but it's like.. I don't know. I just want her to
listen and understand, GOSH I don't want any advice from her
I just want her to listen and understand what I am going
through, is that so hard?? This is really driving me out of
my mind right now. I feel like i'm going to scream. I think
going to work and school tomorrow and getting away from this
house will do me some