2002-02-11 02:53:58 (UTC)

what you feel is what you are and what you are is beautiful

blah. well i feel like shit. i feel a little bit better
but i want to feel all better i've been sick for like 2
month different stuf now and this is the worst and im so
over it.
if im better next weekend i better do something cool. cus
friday night i worked and went to bed, saturday i slept all
day then watched a movie with caroline here and went to
bed, then today i slept all day until 5:30. claudia and i
made valentines that was fun would have been more fun if i
didnt feel like i was dying but they're cute =)
so my mom is absolutely insane crazy pyscho and my dads
still a fucking asshole. he told me today he was guna end
up in jail for beating the shit out of me. i have to get
out of this house. i dont hate her like i hate him but she
makes me feel like i do sometimes because shes such a crazy
bitch and i dont want to talk about it right now.
navins going out with that irritating girl robin. not sure
how i feel about that. i dont think i care too much.
i was thinking today that before may, when we all go our
seperate ways, id really like to have it out with erica.
tell her, you know, how joe fucking hit on me when they
were together and i didnt do shit except get mad at him. i
think she should know that. because im sure she doesnt.
and ask her how she would feel, since all she still ever
talks about is joe, if i made a conscious effort to
convince him to have sex with me. like fucking oh it
infuriates me so much. i hate her so fucking much. what
am i guna do when he gets married? lol.
people are annoying. im so over everyone. i just want out
of my life already. i really want out of this house
though. like now. i dont know if i can wait til may. and
i dont know if i'll ever have enough money.
im going to bed the more i contemplate my life the more i
remember how much it sucks.