sheek

songnuri
2002-02-06 20:58:03 (UTC)

suicide


last night my used to be neighbor/friend committed
suicide.......it totally shocked me.....he was so not the
type of person to do that kind of stuff.......well at least
not in my mind.........and why did i have to find him
dead.......it brought back many flashbacks of when i saw my
best friends die on his snow mobile.........all these
depressing things keep happening to me.......i mean come on
im going through enough stuff right now i dont need this
also.........i cant cry anymore im all cried out i dont think
that my eyes could do it..........and another thing thats
bugging me is that there is this one guy that i like but he
is way out of my league..........meaning that he thinks he is
almighty.......l****says that his synapses were probably
misfiring that day that he said hey to me...........due to a
heatstroke......yeah right its been to cold for it to be even
slightly possible to have a heatstroke.....lol.........what
it was is probably that he thought i looked familiar but
couldnt put a face with a name without the walls of happy
high.......why else would the most popular senior say hey to
me.........i know it wasnt a heatstroke.......the truth is
when he is away from t**** and all his jock friends, he is a
totally different person.......the kind who never cares if a
girl is flatchested or a freak or who even wears a size ten
in shoes.........the kind of person who can see beyond all
that and into the depths of her soul........i know because
when i looked into his eyes i say the deeply sensitive person
inside him struggling to get out........i have an over active
imagination and a pathological need to invent drama in my
life...............oh an i hate stuck up snobs they are so
worried that they may tarnish their reputation by hanging out
with ppl that they normally dont hang out with..........but
then again they are so vain that they would probably jump at
the chance for others to say “oh you are so nice”. when all
they really do is say”FEEEERRRRREEEEEk!!!!!
i tried going to a movie last night to take my mind off of
things....and had a repeat performance of the stupid ticket
master..........he wouldnt let me in he kept saying “no
minors unaccomanied by and adult......so i said fuck you....i
dont want to watch one anyway......you just lost a
customer!!!!!!!!!:P............
then of all things to happen while i was on my blind date
with a really nice guy i get the hiccups right in the middle
of a interesting conversation......this only happens to me
when i drink something hot and then eat bread........i really
dont have any clue why........these werent any lady like
hiccups either........they sounded more like frog chirps only
loud........i tried everything to get rid of them........and
all the guy could do was to keep talking......oh and probably
secretly saying to himself.....what a idiot.....*chuckle
chuckle**yeah so my days are extremely full of
shit.......................




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