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2002-02-06 02:42:09 (UTC)

Why is every guy in my life so screwy

February 05,2002
My friends and myself had an argument today about
whetheror not a person can go through their life without
drinking. Most of my friends looked at me and said that
chances are I would. But see the thing is I've never
wanted to do that. Why would I? I mean sure the
temptation's there...but why?
Whatever let them think what they want...I don't care.
The only thing that I can't stop thinking about is guys and
their warped ways. I just don't understand it. I mean....
there is not one cute guy in all Manhattan Beach. But
that's not the only problem..all the guys in Torrance, etc.
that I've dated are, shall we say, @$$holes.
Seriously...for once I would like to find a semi-cute guy,
who's a guy-guy, yet semi-in touch. You know what I mean.
This is the first real time in years that I've been single,
and not liked anyone. Maybe it's because I've given up on
all guys in my area. I mean the one guy I really wanted to
get serious with recently moved with his family to Alabama,
we were dating off and on for two years, I don't think he
really knew what I felt for him. The last time we talked
he said it was better know that we're just friends. I
don't want to be just friends. Gosh. But he's moved on
and I have to too.
My ex-boyfriends don't seem to want to leave, they figure
they can get back together with me anytime they want. I'm
too nice. I mean sure I try to be mean, but I can't help
forgiving someone. This one guyfriend of mine Don, yeah
I've talked about him before, he's so adorable, I've liked
him for about 6 years now, since 7th grade, but he's a
total of course it never works.
I know it might sound that I hate guys in general, but I
don't it's just that I wish I could find one who wasn't a
jerk and wouldn't screw me into the ground just because I'm
nice, and didn't move clear across the country. Sure one
or two states I can live with, but 10 come on. Well I have
to go.....biking with my gal pal now. I might write back
later we'll see. Well bye. xoxoxo

Love Always,

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