Midnight

The Nightshade Princess
2002-02-04 01:20:04 (UTC)

Blurry...

I haven't much time to write here... Father's time
limitation is never more acutely felt than during the
weekend. I can't explain the way I feel now. I am...
suddenly weak. I was fine this afternoon. I had gotten
tired of waiting for father to get home from HIS
recreation, and Jen stopped by. I wanted to see Al today,
and my Prince, but I'd been so pissed off that I'd
forgotten to call them until we were already halfway to our
destination. I bought my brother and Jen drinks at the
bookstore where I passed so many lovely hours, it seems so
long ago. I found myself bitter when I stood in that
place, with my brother in black makeup, and beautiful Jen
in a sweet smile. I hated father, suddenly. I despised
his spitefulness, loathed what he has taken from me... In a
few moments, these feelings passed, as Jen took my arm and
we wandered again. I was draped in the usual velvet, my
new boots hurting my feel just a little, but it was a good
pain - of the sort that makes one truly alive. The town
wilts around me - Nowhere'sville USA on Sunday
after "church." It seemed so pointless, suddenly, so tired
and old like most of the people here. I kicked myself,
once again, for not calling my beloved. I missed him
intensely. I missed him as Jen and I tested so many
perfumes earlier that day. I had been so happy in all my
adornments, but now life has become blurry to my tired
eyes...




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