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2002-02-03 18:02:57 (UTC)


okay this is rather... interesting but anyway... i have
a "sister"... she's not actually my sister.. but we live
together.. i live with her family.. so it's like i'm her
brother... but not.. anyway... we have been friends for a
while.. and now.. we're "family"... but anyway... she is
now seeing a friend of a mind.. someone i consider a fairly
good friend.. i found this out yesterday... now normally,
it wouldn't have mattered.. i've had friends go out with
friends before... and it's been no big deal... but.. this
one is different.. this happened yesterday.. so.. last
night.. i had a dream that.. i was being left out...
totally left out... we were at home.. and some people i
know.. who moved away.. were here for some reason.. and she
went out with them.. i thought this was weird cause she
never usually went anywhere without me... so i followed...
and then.. they was a huge gathering of all the people i
know.. most of them my friends.. and hers.. i introduced
her to them.. and they were all dumb founded that i was
even there... and when they gave me some lame excuse as to
why i wasn't invited... i went beserk.. and then.. i woke
up... but.. yeah... i think.. i'm quite jealous.. and i
don't know why... i've always suspected i've wanted to be
more than friends with me so called sister... but.. we're
aren't.. and that's fine.. becuase... usually anyone i want
to be more than friends with... is taken away by some other
guy.. this is the 3rd time... and i don't know.. it's
weird... normally... i'm got these feelings under control..
the last 2 times yes... and i never had dreams like
these... but.. now.. it's different...

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