ruefulformelancholy

life is just a poker game
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2002-02-01 06:03:17 (UTC)

so anyway, part 2

it's weird, reading about the past via entries from months ago and
having it feel like it's been years. i feel like a completely
different person now. more sane. less co-dependent. almost free.

i hurt someone tonight. i didn't hurt them as bad as i
would have, had it been later rather than sooner.

i don't think i'm ready for a relationship. i don't know if
i'll ever be ready for a relationship. i think right now,
i'm happy with just my cats, my circle of friends, and the
little life i've created for myself. and it's gonna be a
helluva girl that breaks her way into all of that.

told jeremy and julie tonight that i was dating a girl.
they handled it rather well, i think. they have probably
always had their suspicions.

i think i almost lost myself again, and that scares me.
that scares me more then anything, i think.

but i didn't.
and i'm back.
so watch out, world.

(there is so much that i want to say).


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