War and Peace
2001-04-23 01:01:39 (UTC)



If words were invented to conceal thought, newspapers are a great
improvement on a bad invention.

Henry David Thoreau

When nature has work to be done, she creates a genius to do it.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Non-combatant, n. A dead Quaker.

Ambrose Bierce

Your life ain't worth a piss in New York City.


The world has achieved brilliance without conscience. Ours is a
world of nuclear giants and ethical infants.

Omar Bradley

A king who can adopt falsehood, and solemnize it from the throne,
justifies the revolution of fortune which reduces him to a private

Thomas Jefferson

The naivete/ of our 'experts' was incredible.

R.V. Jones

28th. (Lord's day) I hear that Nixon is condemned to be shot to
death, for his cowardice, by a Council of War.

Samuel Pepys May 1665

In New York I am to be disenfranchised and in New Jersey hanged.
Having substantial objections to both, I shall not, for the present,
hazard either, but shall seek another country.

Aaron Burr

I deplore, with yuou, the putrid state into which our newspapers have
passed, and the malignity, the vulgarity, and mendacious spirit of
those who write for them;...

Thomas Jefferson

Never do today what you can do, as well tomorrow; because something
may occur to make you regret your premature action...

Aaron Burr

I have often met with such Treatment from those I was all the while
endeavoring to serve. At other times I have been extoll'd
extravagantly when I have had little or no Merit. These are the
Opperations of Nature.

Ben Franklin

Nature is conducted on the principal of robbing Peter to pay Paul.
He giveth them their meat in due season. Yes, by taking the meat
from the mouth of something else that would be glad enough to have it.
Or again, He giveth them as meat to something else in due season; or
He giveth their meat in due season to something else.

Samuel Butler

The investigatiion of nature is an infinite pasture-ground, where all
may graze, and where the more bite, the longer the grass grows, the
sweeter is its flavor, and the more it nourishes.

T.H. Huxley 1871

The newspaper trade, as now conducted, is prostitution. It mows down
the boys as they come from the colleges. It defaces the very desire
for truth and leaves them without a principle to set a clock by.
They grow to disbelieve in the reality of ideas.

John Jay chapman 1862-1933

Natural resources and inanimate energy...are increasingly regarded as
affected with a public interest...Certainly they were left by God or
geology to mankind and not to the Standard Oil Company of
California. If this is not sound moral doctrine, I do not know what

Stuart Chase 1934 _The_Economy_of_Abundance_

The more I studied it, the more grotesquely bad it grew.

N.Y., per Rudyard Kipling

Aside from family, dancing, and religion (including a prodigious
recall of biblical quotatiions), Fisher had only one consuming
passion--the Royal Navy.

Daniel Yergin

New York is a sucked orange.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Crazed with avarice, lust and rum,
New York, thy name's Delirium.

B.R. Newton

Newton was the greatest genius that ever existed, and the most
fortunate, for we cannot find more than once a system of the world to

Pierre-Simon Laplace

Nobody can conceive that nature ever intended to throw away a Newton
upon the occupations of a crown.

Thomas Jefferson to David Rittenhouse 1778

For one thing, he said, a decent medical school would have to be
attached to a major university, as well as to a good hospital,
neither of which existed in Newark.

Abe Flexnor per Ed Regis

The man who is dishonest as a statesmen would be a dishonest man in
any station.

Thomas Jefferson to Geo. Logan Nov. 1816

I believe I shall have to advertise for a Secretary of the Navy.
General Smith is performing the duties gratis, as he refuses both
commission and salary, even his expenses, lest it should affect his
seat in the House of Representatives.

Ib. to Governeur Mmorris May 1801

Reading the newspapers but little and that little but as the romance
of the day, a word of truth now and then comes like the drop of water
on the tongue of Dives.

Ib. to James Madison April 1809

To the request of my opinion of the manner in which a newspaper
should be conducted, so as to be most useful, I should answer: "By
restraining it to true facts and sound principles only." Yet I fear
such a paper would find few subscribers.

Ib. to John Norvell 1807

A newpaper is a private enterprise, owing nothing to the public.

Wall Street Jounal January 20, 1925

Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in newspapers.

Thomas Jefferson to Nathaniel Macon 1819

As nations improve so do their gods.

Georg Christoph Lichtenberg

In New York wisdom and virtue, as understood in New England, were but
lightly esteemed.

Henry Adams

Our priests are too fanatical, and our nobles too ignorant, to become
citizens, or to perceive the advantages of becoming and forming a
nation. Every one of them knows he is a slave,and lives with the
hope of one day or another becoming a petty despot in his turn.


A people without reliable news is, sooner or later, a people without
the basis of freedom.

Harold J. Laski 1893-1950

If a man makes money by publishing a newspaper, by poisoning the
wells of information, by feeding the people a daily spiritual death,
he is the greatest criminal I can conceive.

Ferdinand Lassalle

If I had the power that the New Testament Narrative says that Jesus
had, I would not cure one person of blindness, I would make blindness
impossible; I would not cure one person of leprousy, I would abolish

Joseph Lewis March 21, 1956

In the right to eat the bread...which his own hand earns, he (the
Negro) is my equal and the equal of Judge Douglas, and the equal of
any living man.

Abraham Lincoln Lincoln/Douglas debate August 2, 1858

...the indespensable requirement for a good newspaperman--as eager to
tell a lie as the truth.

Norman Mailer January 27, 1956

Nationalism is an infantile disease. It is the measles of mankind.

Albert Einstein

None so wise as the one who knows nothing.

Old American saying

Now I see why I decided not to do it last year.

Richard Nixon per Bob Haldemann

We are responsible button-down people, we don't demagogue, and we're
naive to think we'll get credit for doing a good job.

Richard Nixon ditto

P made the point that he has to save himself as the big gun for the
big problems, therefore, he can't even know what's going on with the
Don Nixon calls.

H.R. Haldemann

The P called at about 12:30 and I asked how church was. Said, "Well,
it's always good for the soul to take an hour off once in a while."
He commented that the B-52 strikes were exceptionally effective, the
best ever in the war.

Ib. April 16, 1972

Nothing would please the Kremlin more than to have the people of this
country choose a second-rate President.

Richard M. Nixon

The nation, being in effect a licensed predatory concern, is not
bound by the decencies of that code of laws and morals that governs
private conduct.

Thorstein Veblen 1923

If you injure your neighbor, better not do it by halves.


Satire is great, but for the Nazis you use baseball bats and broken

Woody Allen

If I have ever made any valuable discoveries, it has been owing more
to patient attention, than to any other talent.

Isaac Newton

The nuclear industry has a phrase for things that go wrong all the
time: "normally occurring abnormal occurrances."

Robert McCrum, William Cran, Robert MacNeil 1986


Everybody's entitled to their own stupid opinion.

Guy B. Stiles

In all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane.

Mark Twain

We can never be sure that the opinion we are endeavoring to stifle is
a false opinion: and if we were sure, it would be an evil still.

John Stuart Mill

New opinions are always suspected, and usually opposed, without other
reason but because they are not already common.

John Locke

Omnipresent, n. Everywhere at once. That the power of omnipresence,
or ubiquity, is denied to mortals was known as early as the time of
Sir Gotle Roche, who in a speech in Parliament said: "A man cannot
be in two places at once unless he is a bird."

Ambrose Bierce

Orthodox, n. An ox wearing the popular religious yoke.


Overcharge, v. To ask a higher price than you can get.


Overdose, n. A fatal dose of medicine when administered by other
than a physician.


I never submitted the whole system of my opinions to the creed of any
party of man whatever, in religion, in philosophy, in politics, or in
anything else, where I was capable of thinking for myself.

Thomas Jefferson

Our opinions are not in our own power; they are form'd and govern'd
much by circumstances, that are often as inexplicable as they are

Ben Franklin

The obscurist epoch is today...

Robert Louis Stevenson

An orang-outang marries at the age of seven or eight, raises a family
of seventy or eighty children, and is still as hale and hearty at
eighty as a European at forty-five.

H.L. Mencken

I am convinced that the best end for an officer is the last bullet of
the war.

George Patton

I have experienced amny instances of being obliged, by better
information or fuller consideration, to change my opinions, even on
important subjects, which I once thought right, but found to be

Ben Franklin

An honest and scrupulous man in the oil business is so rare as to
rank as a museum piece.

Harold Ickes

The social structure of New York City at the present time defies

John Kenneth Galbraith

Ocean, n. A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made
for man--who has no gills.

Ambrose Bierce 1906

They that buy an office must sell something.

Thomas Fuller 1732

When God gives a man an office, He gives him enough brains to fill it.

German proverb per H.L. Mencken

Public opinion is no more than this:
What people think that other people think.

Alfred Austin 1887

Interpret to me this libretto, lest I dilate with the wrong emotion.

Rufus Choate

What a fund of universal unconscious scepticism must underlie the
world's opinions.

Samuel Butler

Difference of opinion leads to inquiry, and inquiry leads to truth.

Thomas Jefferson

I had on nothing but a pair of cotton flannel drawers, an old blue
blouse, a pair of mocassins and a hat without any crown, and I do not
blame the Mexican commander for not believing I was an officer.

Leonard Wood August 28, 1886

A difference of opinion is what makes horse races and missionaries.

Will Rogers

Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human

H.L. Mencken

We are to guard against ourselves; not against ourselves as we are,
but as we may be; for who can now imagine what we may become under
circumstances not now imaginable.

Thomas Jefferson 1822

The ordinary affairs of a nation offer little difficulty to a person
of any experience; but the gift of office is the dreadful burthen
which oppresses him.

Ib. to James Sullivan 1808

It is now twenty-five years since I sent my southern fellow citizens
two shipments (about 500 plants) of the olive tree of Aix, the finest
olives in the world. If any of them still exist, it is merely as a
curiosity in their gardens; not a single orchard of them has been

Ib. to James Ronaldson January 1813

I have never thought that a difference in political, any more than in
religious opinions, should disturb the friendly intercourse of

Ib. to David Campbell 1810

When public opinion changes, it is with the rapidity of thought.

Ib. to Charles Yancey 1816

He who allows oppression shares the crime.

Erasmus Darwin 1731-1802

It is the absolute right of the state to supervise the formulation of
public opinion.

Joseph Goebbels 1923

We have less reason to be surprised or offended when we find others
differ from us in opinion, because we very often differ from

Samuel Johnson

These people actually converse in lies,--they think in lies--and I
verily believe that any appeal they may make to their own consciences
is _answered_by_a_lie_.

Joseph Dalton Hooker (Bhotea authorities) Dec. 2, 1840(?)

...we must protect the right of our opponents to speak because we
must hear what they have to say.

Walter Lippman August, 1939

The schools of Oxford and Cambridge were founded in a dark age of
false and barbarous science; and they are still tainted with the
vices of their origin. ...The legal incorporation of these societies
by the charters of popes and kings has given them a monopoly of the
public instruction; and the spirit of monopolists is narrow, lazy,
and oppressive: their work is more costly and less productive than
that of independent artists; and the new improvements so eagerly
grasped by the competition of freedom, are admitted with slow and
sullen reluctance in those proud corporatiions, above the fear of a
rival and below the confession of an error.

Edward Gibbon ca. 1789

God and country are an upbeatable team; they break all records for
oppression and bloodshed.

Luis Bunuel

On an occasion of this kind it becomes more than a moral duty to
speak one's mind. It becomes a pleasure.

Oscar Wilde

In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.

Albert Einstein

A charlatan makes obscure what is clear; a thinker makes clear what
is obscure.

Hugh Kingsmill

I still remember Uncle Rick sitting in that chair of his, listening
to opera. He'd have this weird expression on his face. Then when he
finally got untied from the chair, he'd try to catch us. Man, he
hated opera.

Jack Handey

Plot to Kill Officer Had Vicious Side.

Chicago Tribune