simplesimonfan

Meg Ro
2002-01-30 23:52:04 (UTC)

Now I'm free, free fallin'...

hey there,
I am worried about A. her mom went in for her biops on Tue,
and they won't know 'til Friday I guess. I know that
everything will turn out alright, in fact I am confident of
it, and I have said special prayers for her mom, but I know
that the waiting is hard on A....if you read this friend
It'll be alright!
Last night I was quite happy that J. said yes to go to turnabout,
I'll be fun, I think I'll go all out for this one because I want him
to have a good time. He said that he wants me to pick the group, but
I feel bad, wouldn't he rather go with his friends? Yesterday on the
phone I realized that I can talk to him about almost anything like
our long and stimulating conversation about wedgies, which
is really cool. Everyday in some way or another, I like him more and
more...today I thought he looked really cute, and I said hi to him,
and I kind of stood there awkwardly-he looked great though. I don't
know, I think perhaps I am really falling for him, or I already have?
I am trying sooo hard to remain impartial, I don't want to make a big
thing out of the situation, I mean I do, but I don't. I only..I don't
know- I know that I love the time I spend with him, I enjoy talking
to him, and other stuff too...(A. you know what I mean.) Yesterday he
asked me if he should read my diary and I said no, and then he asked
if he
could read it and I said no, and he asked if it says bad stuff...(I
don't really think it says bad stuff-does it A?) I don't know, it's
my most personal feelings about him (that I am broadcasting to the
world, right?) and I don't know that I am ready to share them with
him. Someday, but I'm not sure that the timing is right.
I think it's hilarious, when I place myself back a year ago...I was
in lifegarding with him. I thought he was cute, and funny but I
mean, (I'm the kind of girl that never makes the first move,) so I
never told him. I wish I had, if I had known that...I don't know, If
I had known that he was this..great? I would have totally tried this
sooner. I remember when I wanted to go to homecoming with him, A. (I
NEVER TOLD YOU THIS AND YOU CAN TELL NO ONE ELSE!!!ESPECIALLY HIM!!)
and I kind of had this "idea" and then it turned out exactly as
I
had
wanted it and better. I feel bad for being so weird in the beginning
of our relationship, I always want to appologize for that, but I know
that it would just come out awkward and jumbled, just like everything
I say.
I couldn't be more happy with the way things turned out.
A. I will say a special prayer for your mom again tonight.
I have to go to a hitting clinic for softball tongight (YES! I have
officially slipped into the seventh circle of hell that is DGN
softball!) alright, good night, pleasant dreams, I love you all.

MegRO




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