bluff before i

my life, my world, my mind, my soul
2002-01-28 19:12:22 (UTC)


today is a good day so far..i didn't expect that..i'm a
little dissapointed because seniors were to bring our baby
pictures to put in the year book..i really wanted to do
that but i forgot it and today was the last
now..i'm not in the picture with the whole senior class
because i chose to be absent that day..i don't have a
senior quote and now i don't get my baby picture published
in the mum better buy me a page..i need
something in there from me..oh and the picture that they
are using for the yearbook isn't even the one i wanted to
be in there..okay enough of my sob story..

we actually got our newspapers this time..they usually
don't bring them for this class because they always forget
about us..there are a lot of pictures from winterformal..
and one is a picture of jeremy, me, kat, poula, and her
date..and it's cool because on the bottom of the picture it
says "these two guys are lucky to have these three
beautiful girls stop and take a picture with them."..haha
it was so funny to see me in there..i've never been inside
my schools newspaper before..usually it's all the popular
people..i don't think that i'll be in the yearbook a lot
though..just for band and then my class picture..but oh

finals are so close..tomorrow they start..i wont have any
tests for the classes that i attend tomorrow though..and
we'll have a pizza party in this class..which is cool..but
wednesday is going to be tough..those are the two classes
that i'm struggling in..i hope i don't drown in the tests..

jeremy please try your hardest..i believe you can pass..

i feel bad now for some reason..thinking about jeremy..his
parents make a big deal over one small thing..something as
small as nailpolish.. they said that people would make fun
of him..but i think that he's old enough to put up with it
if they did..but i don't think they would..they need to
learn to respect his individuality..and they need to know
that they can't always make his decisions..he needs to make
some of his own too.. and not just that..they should have
just let him wear it and deside if he wanted to wear it
himself..what if he didn't like it later??...they should
have let him deside..if he wants to express himself..then
let him!!

now because of that, jeremy is now inspired to shop for
something unique..something that he'll wear to express
himself..i hope his parents see that he's his own person..

funny that i get into mum just talked to me
yesterday..we were in the car alone(going to get doughnuts)
and she told me that someone had told him that i've grown
so much and i've changed and that i don't look like i like
to do what other people do..and my dad said that i'm not
like other people..and i'm a true individual and that he's
proud of me because he raised me to be that way..and he
said that he raised me not to follow the croud..and then he
told the person..she's a good kid..i didn't know that my
dad cared so much about's weird..and then yesterday
when he my mum and i went to the store before we went to my
cousins mum put her arm around me and told me she
loved me and i told her that i loved her too..and then she
said do you love your dad??..and i told her yes..and she
said tell him..and i felt myself go red and then said that
i didn't want to..and she told him.."she has something to
tell you" i said in the shyest voice i ever heard come
out of me.."i love you"..and he laughed and said yeah right
in a really sarcastic voice..and then my mum told me to hug
him..i told her he doesn't hug me..and then she told my dad
what i said and he grabbed me and put me in a headlock and
then told me that i deserved a noogie..and he put his hands
in a fist and rubbed his knuckles against the top of my
head really hard..and i laughed even though my hair was
really messed up..i do love my parents..

i feel bad though because yesterday i had the opertunity to
experiance what it was like to be an only child..i feel bad
because i was alone with my parents..and i got what i
wanted..and i liked it..but then when i saw my sister that
day..she treated me like crap so i didn't regret it after

oh yeah..i found out what my real last name's
weird..i thought i wasn't supposed to know..but my dad told
jeremys parents..and it was weird to hear them..he told him
freely and i wasn't supposed to know when we were little
but i spied on my parents's all too weird..your
name is one thing and then it changes in the next..the
truth finally comes out!!..ah ha..

i'm an individual??

could this be true??