The Shadow of Myself
Ad 0:
2002-01-22 05:49:28 (UTC)

maybe someday I'll figure it out...

It just wasn't what I expected. Maybe one of these days
I'll learn not to expect anything.. so that way I won't be
looking for something that I won't find.

Well just b/c things didn't happen exactly how I thought
they would, doesn't really mean anything. See.. I thought
that when he huged me I was going to drop to the floor and
be like.. whoa. But b/c I was surrouned by other people
when I got the hug (both of them) I was like.. hmm.. well
this is normal. Anyway.. yeah.. that didn't really bother
me that much. What really got me.. what how he looked in
my eyes. So like.. we would be talking.. about just
whatever.. and I would look at him.. and he'd be looking
straight into my eyes. I had to turn away several times
b/c it was just too intense for me. I mean I know that he
wasn't trying to send me any hidden vibe or whatever. But
I'm a firm believer to the fact that the eyes are the
doorway to the soul. So I felt like even though we were
talking about nothing in particular there was something
there. I guess it was just really cool. I wonder if he
meant to look that deep into my eyes.. or if that is just
what he does. I don't know...

On the way back to school.. I was thinking. I'm going to
stop searching for things that satisfy my flesh.. b/c I
have found the very thing that fills my soul. What I'm
going to have to work the hardest on is sticking to that.
I know thats what I need to do. I know that with all my


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