kajira

not set
2002-01-21 03:38:56 (UTC)

January 7, 2002 Mistress Confusement


2002-01-07 12:05:26 (GMT)

Mistress's confusement

Have you ever been on a roller coaster ride, where on
minute you heart is beating so hard till it hurts, next min
you are just enjoying the ride with the breeze running
through your hair, and the next min, your body is whirling
so fast you are finding it hard to breath. Well that is
what last night was for me, when my boy came online, i was
so happy, we had talked about the time when he will become
totally mine. Just putting a collar on someone doesn't
make them totally yours, but having them give themselves to
you in every possible way.

When he came to me i was so happy to see him, our offline
lifes had kept us apart for a short time. After a short
time i took him to the cellar, gawd, i wanted to do so much
but held back in fear of him not likeing it, or me going to
fast.

I pierced his nipples, number one, i think it is so sexy,
two, i had to see how much control i had. I was so happy
when he didn't protest it. Things were going along ok I
guess, even tho I was holding back a lot, like I said, not
sure if it was in fear of going to fast for him, being to
rough, or in fear of loosing my boy, but I was holding back.

I was trying to work my way into something, and in fear of
him not liking it, i was trying to make sure in my heart he
understood he could stop this at any time. But instead i
ended up very upset and left him going back to living
room. I felt like such a failure as his domme when He kept
saying, yes boy will do what ever pleases my Mistress.

I wish he could remember as a Dom that you want your sub
happy to and doing things that the sub wants to do. It
pleases my heart greatly to hear him beg for my body and
want it.. not just to say,, yes if Mistress wants boy too.






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