faraway
faraway
from the past...
I miss richie. I know thats weird but I do. I had a dream
about him last night
I wish I knew if I was going to see
him when I visit home this summer, if I end up going. I
wouldnt have sex with him if I was still with josh, but I
might kiss him
he was just so beautiful physically
my
golden boy, Ive never been as sexually infatuated with
anyone as I was with him. I know Im in love with josh, and
for gods sake, I never even knew why I felt this way about
richie. We were never close emotionally, we never hung out
very much. But since the day I first saw him, my feelings
were so strong and yearning for him. I wish, that just one
more time, I could touch him all over over, kiss his neck,
run my hands through his hair, whisper things in his ear. I
feel like Im betraying my boyfriend by even thinking that,
but my feelings for josh are not diminished by this- he is
honestly my first real love, the only serious relationship
Ive ever had. I would never give up josh to have a
relationship with richie, even if I had the chance, which I
wouldnt. If I did though I wouldnt even need to think
about it- my boy treats me like gold, hes talented,
responsible, we get along wonderfully and never get tired
of each other. And hes pretty damn handsome as well. Ill
probably always have that school girl crush on richie in
the back of my mind, but it doesnt really bother me. I
forget about him for long periods of time, months, but then
Ill see him in a dream again and hell be back in my
thoughts. Who knows how the mind works
not I, said the fox