Deep Down
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2002-01-20 01:53:06 (UTC)


I feel as if a big hole has been cut out from my very
heart. I am bleeding from the inside out, for all to see. I
cannot breathe anymore..each breath, more shallow than the
first. I cannot see. I feel like I'm falling into an
endless black hole and I can't get out. I'm numb.
Everything I look at or feel is empty, meaningless,
pointless to the point where I can't even explain it. I
haven't talked to you in just a few days, and this is how I
feel. Pathetic. I know. Foolish. I know. Jerk? Am I? Is
that what I appear to you? Is that how I come off as?
Because, that is how I view myself. Selfish. Rude. Unkind.
Thoughtless. Evil. Unloving. You are my life.....I should
be there with you!!! Why aren't I? Why is my singing career
going in merless circles??? Why are the faces around me
never changing? WHERE AM I? Why am I so confused and lost??
It's because you aren't here. You aren't talking to me.
You. I love YOU. I feel like dying. My heart has a stabbing
pain to it. It's heavy. I can't breathe. I need help. I
need love. I need to feel your touch. LOVE ME.

Love Ike Forever!

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